Single Moms: Meet Your Champion

My dear single mom, if you do not have hope for the future, if you don’t expect wonderful things for you and your children, you are being deceived. You have yet to discover the true champion Who resides within you: "In all things we are more than conquerors through him who loves us" (Romans 8:37). With Christ, you are now on the road to victory, not victimhood. With hope in God, you can have victory over every situation—yes, even divorce and single parenting.

You are the leader of your home now, and as daunting as that role may seem, God has equipped you to fulfill that responsibility. He wants to give you a "can-do attitude" and a clear direction of what to do and how to do it.

When you focus on God and what you can do through Him, things really start to happen. You will feel alive, renewed, and refreshed, knowing that you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you (Philippians 4:13). Your priorities will shift, and you will bring order to the chaos of your life. I know because that’s what happened to me.

God’s Word tells us that He has a plan for us. It also says, "Whatever things are true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things" (Philippians 4:8). I decided to put those words into practice and ask God to reveal His plan for me each day. Once I understood what God wanted me to do, I disciplined myself to accomplish those tasks for my children, my home, and myself. I stopped staring into space, wondering how I would do it all. I learned to live in the present and, as a result, worked effectively and saw results.

What God Wants for You

Beyond accomplishing daily tasks, God’s Word tells us that He wants us to be healthy in all areas of our lives. "I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well" (3 John 2). Sometimes this doesn’t take the form of worldly success, but God is with you, desiring you to live a life of purpose and blessing. He wants you to be filled with Him, experience His goodness, and know that His plans are good.

God wants the fruit of the Holy Spirit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control—to overflow in your life and your children’s lives. "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing" (John 15:5).

He desires time with you, your children, and time for yourself. He wants to provide for you, protect you, and be with you through every detail of your day. He longs to be your husband and your children’s father, making you healthy, whole, complete, and fulfilled in Him alone.

Most of all, dear single mom, He wants to love you like you’ve never been loved before. He says: "As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love" (John 15:9). He wants you to know the treasure of His sacrifice on the cross for you.

Do You Want What God Wants?

Do you want what God desires for you and your children? Will you make yourself available to Him and seek what He wants for you? If you will, God will do the work in you—all you need to do is ask Him.

Are You a Healthy Single Mom?

In what areas of life do you need God’s strength? Below are statements describing an emotionally and spiritually healthy single mom. Mark "yes" if the statement applies to you, and "no" if it doesn’t.

Don’t be discouraged if you mark "no" on many or even all of these statements. We all start somewhere—I started from ground zero in every area! God’s desire is for you to flourish in this season of life. None of us will reach perfection until we see His face. These areas require lifelong growth and pursuit.

Take your time as you reflect on these statements. Be honest with yourself, knowing that this is the beginning of a fulfilling journey with God.

• I am no longer full of fear.
• I am no longer discouraged.
• I do not live in the past.
• I no longer run away from God—I run to God.
• I have let go of anger, bitterness, rejection, and fear.
• I have stopped focusing on my circumstances.
• I am no longer filled with despair.
• I resist temptation and flee from the enemy.
• I live to please God alone.
• I understand grace.
• I understand mercy.
• I completely depend on God.
• I consistently do the right thing.
• I love the Lord with all my mind and strength.
• I seek God’s face in everything.
• I am free in Christ.
• I walk by faith, allowing the Holy Spirit to guide me.
• I am on God’s journey instead of my own.
• I live a life free of evil intentions.
• I receive God’s direction every day.
• I create peace wherever I go.
• I am fulfilled by Christ alone.
• I live out the character of Christ.
• I seek God’s wisdom in all areas of my life.

Reflect and Pray

How did you do? Did you uncover areas to bring before the Lord? Pray over each one, asking God for His grace to change.

You are a champion with God, and you can have a great future as a single mom. My prayer is that we both live the life God intends: a life of purpose, focus, and balance. We cannot do this by our strength alone—it’s only by the grace and power of the Holy Spirit. May God raise you up on eagles' wings, so you soar to new heights with Him.

"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint" (Isaiah 40:31).

Lori Little, founder of A Woman By Design ministry, is the former Director of John C. Maxwell's THRiVE! and Becoming A Woman of Influence. A major focus of Lori's ministry is the Hope and Help for the Single Mom initiative.

Her resource, 21 Principles of a Healthy Single Mom, offers meaningful messages, helpful advice, and loving encouragement. 

Originally published March 15, 2006.