A God That Keeps Score - The Crosswalk Devotional - March 11
A God that Keeps Score
By Michelle Lazurek
Bible Reading:
“Record my misery; list my tears on your scroll—are they not in your record?” Psalm 56:8
Clutching my tear-stained tissue, I dabbed my red, swollen eyes. Several wads of crumpled tissue lined the couch arm. Ministry had taken its toll again: conflict with church members, inner turmoil behind the scenes, unbearable loneliness, and too much financial strain.
I was tired and worn out. After several years in ministry, the constant fighting within the congregation took a toll on my physical, mental, and emotional state. As much as we had felt called to plant to church, it didn't seem fair. We had to deal with the strain of raising two children and all the hardships of church ministry. I often felt like I was the only one dealing with these issues. Congregation members would come and go, flitting in and out of our church body to do whatever they pleased. Yet, I was always the one who had to sacrifice. Quickly, I grew resentful.
Didn't God care?
Didn't he see?
Didn't he know?
These questions often flooded my mind. It felt as if God had singled us out, targeting us with an unbearable weight that was crushing our souls. I felt as if I was carrying the weight of life on only my shoulders.
Yet, God promises to carry all our tears and place them in a bottle. God records all the tears we will ever cry in this lifetime. He sees every character assassination, accusation, emotional strain, financial hardship, and health crisis. Jesus also understood suffering. He suffered greatly while on Earth.
He reached out to his father and stayed intimately connected to him. His connection with his father got him through difficult times. He understood betrayal. He understood character assassinations and ridicule. He withstood some of the worst physical beatings of anyone's life.
God knows every bit of suffering that we endure. He doesn't forget us. He sees and knows all. Isn't knowing that we serve a God who keeps score comforting? Like a coach who frequently checks his playbook to cue the next plan of attack on the opposing team, God has a plan for every aspect of your life, including your suffering. God promises to seek vengeance on those who treat us harshly.
His justice may not come quickly, but it is always right on time. He seeks revenge when he sees fit, not when we see fit. Sometimes it is difficult to trust God for his timing when it comes to revenge, but even when our flesh wants to get even, God promises to keep every scorecard.
Because God is a God of both justice and grace, even the most horrible offender has an opportunity to turn to the Lord. With a heart of repentance, anyone can seek his loving arms. However, a hardened heart that never softens will one day get the justice it deserves.
If you think that God does not care about your suffering, this verse should assure you that he indeed does. Even though God keeps no record of our wrongs because of Jesus's sacrifice on the cross, he does keep a record of all those who treat us harshly.
Throughout the Old Testament, God executes plans to reward the righteous and punish the unrighteous. God and his grace give people ample time to turn back to him. But when the time is up, God indeed gets even for us.
God sees you and your pain. He considers every crumpled-up tissue. He knows every time you cry out to him. He knows every word in your journal. He knows your thoughts before you even think them. God knows you desire justice amid your suffering. God promises that if we trust him, he will swiftly bring it in his timing.
Have you ever thought that God does not care to see or know what you're going through? Do you run toward him to get closer to him, or do you run away, creating distance between you? It is never too late to turn back to God.
Today is a new day if you're feeling distant from God because of your suffering. Turn a new chapter. Take that first step toward reconciliation with God. He's always waiting for you. He desires your fellowship. He promises to forgive us and give us his grace.
Father, may we trust in your timing for justice and vengeance. Soften our hearts and allow us to turn back to you. Let us feel the warmth of your embrace. Please help us remember that you record all our misery and keep our tears in your bottle. Amen.
Intersecting Faith & Life:
Are there areas where you wish God would seek vengeance on your behalf? Give it over to God and see what he does.
Further Reading:
1 Peter 5:7
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/BitsAndSplits
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