Letting Go and Learning to Forgive - The Crosswalk Devotional - February 27
Letting Go and Learning to Forgive
By Alexis A. Goring
Bible Reading:
“Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbor, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.” – Matthew 5:43-45 KJV
Have you ever struggled to forgive someone who wronged you? Someone or more than one person whose words and actions devastated you and negatively impacted your life?
The older you become and the more life experiences that happen to you, chances are you have been treated unfairly at least once. When that happens, how do you respond? It is human nature to become angry because you feel offended by mistreatment. It is part of our carnal nature to want to take revenge. And if possible, we may remove the offenders from our social network both online and offline. But what does The Bible say about how to treat people who mistreat us?
According to Matthew 5:43-45, we’re told to love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us. We are also supposed to bless those who curse us. Why? Because this is what children of God do.
God doesn’t hold grudges, and neither should we. As for getting revenge, we shouldn’t do that either because The Bible says in Romans 12:18-20 (NLT), “Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, “I will take revenge; I will pay them back,” says the Lord. Instead, “If your enemies are hungry, feed them. If they are thirsty, give them something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals of shame on their heads.”
Forgiveness isn’t an easy thing to do. It is hard to extend forgiveness to someone who hurt us deeply. Sometimes even slight offenses feel unforgivable. But did you know that harboring unforgiveness hurts you more than helps you? Marianne Williamson who is an American author, speaker and political activist, described this truth well. She said, “Unforgiveness is like drinking poison yourself and waiting for the other person to die.” This is why practicing forgiveness is for your personal benefit and it sets you free.
“Forgiveness: Your Health Depends on It” is an article on the website of Johns Hopkins Medicine. It tells you how unforgiveness can do damage to your body. But practicing forgiveness can greatly benefit your health. According to this online article, “Whether it’s a simple spat with your spouse or long-held resentment toward a family member or friend, unresolved conflict can go deeper than you may realize—it may be affecting your physical health. The good news: Studies have found that the act of forgiveness can reap huge rewards for your health, lowering the risk of heart attack; improving cholesterol levels and sleep; and reducing pain, blood pressure, and levels of anxiety, depression and stress. And research points to an increase in the forgiveness-health connection as you age.”
These are all practical reasons why we need to freely forgive people. The other reasons are spiritual. The Bible says in Matthew 6:14-15 (NIRV), “Forgive other people when they sin against you. If you do, your Father who is in heaven will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive the sins of other people, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
Our Father (God) in Heaven expects us to forgive everyone who hurt us, every time. Jesus Christ said this in Matthew 18:21-22 NIV. The passage reads, “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”
Please note that this Bible verse about forgiveness does not mean that you stay around people who inflict abuse or cause danger or threaten your life. God does not expect you to stay in a dangerous situation with someone who is hurting you, but He does expect you to forgive them. And to make sure that you stay safe.
Okay, I think we covered the basics on why it is important to forgive everyone who hurt you. Now let’s talk about how to forgive. The first step is being honest with God. Pour out your heart to Him and do not hold back on expressing the pain you feel. God can handle your honesty. Then invite God into your situation and ask Him to teach you how to genuinely forgive even the deepest offenses. Ask Him to help you to let go of all the offense you felt as you learn to forgive everyone who hurt you. Finally, ask God to help you pray for the people who hurt you and trust Him to set you free from the burden of unforgiveness.
For a more in-depth look at how to practice forgiveness, read this article by Clarence L. Haynes, Jr. titled “4 Steps to Take When You Need to Forgive Someone.”
There are three Christian faith-based songs for reflection that I thought of as I wrote this devotional. I encourage you to listen to each one to continue in your journey of understanding why forgiveness is both good and beneficial for us.
Song of Reflection #1: “One Thing I Know” by Selah
Song of Reflection #2: “Forgiveness” by Matthew West
Song of Reflection #3: “The Jesus Way” by Phil Wickham
Intersecting Faith & Life:
Do you struggle with practicing forgiveness? How did you feel the first time you forgave someone?
Further Reading:
Colossians 3:13
Ephesians 4:31-32
Luke 6:37
Luke 17:3-4
Mark 11:25
Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Evan Kirby
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