What Withholding Forgiveness Reveals about Our Hearts - The Crosswalk Devotional - March 26
What Withholding Forgiveness Reveals about Our Hearts
By Lynette Kittle
Bible Reading:
“Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy time seven times.’” – Matthew 18:21-22
In watching rerun episodes of the classic hit television show “I Love Lucy,” the Church could learn a few lessons in how to forgive one another, seeing how over and over again, the characters forgive each other.
If unfamiliar with the show, the lead characters, who are also neighbors and best friends, Ricky and Lucy Ricardo and Fred and Ethel Mertz, repeatedly go through misunderstandings, quarrels, disagreements, and even knock-down, drag-out fights, exchanging hurtful words and actions, but eventually working through them, ending each show by making up and declaring their love for one another, vowing to be lifelong friends.
It’s a picture of what relationships are supposed to be, not the hurtful words and actions, but the forgiving, making up, and loving one another regardless of past hurts.
Sadly Lacking in Forgiveness
Sadly, even Christians today are lacking in knowing how to forgive and reconcile with each other, following secular counsel more than God’s counsel concerning forgiving one another.
Colossians 3:13 urges, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you,”
But instead of following God’s direction and repeatedly forgiving someone, some are setting up their own rules by dropping people right and left from their lives, canceling them out, unwilling to forgive the 70 x 7 that Jesus instructs us to follow.
But still, God is the author of forgiveness, not us. Yet, some are skipping over Ephesians 4:32, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”
Counter to Jesus’ words, some churches are even encouraging and supporting individuals casting people aside who they deem “toxic,” rather than bringing them to redemption and reconciliation.
But what if the people who refuse to forgive others are actually more toxic than those who need to be forgiven? What if their hearts are filled with pride, setting their standard for forgiveness above God’s requirement for forgiveness?
We’re All Born Toxic
God’s way is to forgive toxic people; if it wasn’t, then He wouldn’t have given Jesus to the world as John 3:16 explains. “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
Since Adam’s fall in the garden, humans are born toxic, contaminated by sin. Romans 5:12 describes, “Therefore, just as sin entered the world through one man, and death through sin, and in this way death came to all people, because all sinned.”
It’s not until we receive God’s forgiveness through Jesus Christ’s sacrifice on the cross that we become detoxified. As Romans 5:19 explains, “For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous.”
Sadly, some believers are falling terribly short these days, not understanding how unforgiveness is extremely toxic in the life of a believer, not considering that unforgiveness is sin, as well as an indicator and evidence of unbelief.
The Forgiveness Meter
God doesn’t ever approve of our being unforgiving. It’s unacceptable because we have been forgiven by Him. By receiving His forgiveness, we surrender our right to be unforgiving towards others, and God will not ever justify us withholding forgiveness from each other.
Christians who withhold forgiveness do not understand that forgiveness is a meter of sorts, revealing how much we’ve received God’s forgiveness for ourselves. It’s very telling, exposing our heart and how little or much we’ve truly received His forgiveness.
Pride is behind unforgiveness, convincing us we have a higher standard of forgiveness than God does, rejecting His instruction to forgive, believing we know better.
“The Sky Is the Limit” with God’s Forgiveness
With God, we’re given an unending source of forgiveness for ourselves and for each other, surrendering our right to hold an unforgiving heart towards anyone else after we receive God’s forgiveness for ourselves.
Although as humans, we may limit the times we are willing to forgive others, God does not. If we were to see a list of how many times God has already forgiven us to this point in our lives, it would be countless. Still, He continues to forgive us through the end of our lives on earth.
Intersecting Faith & Life:
Have you considered how many times God forgives you in a day, a week, a year, or a lifetime? If not, ask Him to remind you of all the times He’s forgiven you and if there is anyone you need to forgive.
Further Reading:
Is Unforgiveness Evidence of Unbelief?
Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/fizkes
Lynette Kittle is married with four daughters. She enjoys writing about faith, marriage, parenting, relationships, and life. Her writing has been published by Focus on the Family, Decision, Today’s Christian Woman, kirkcameron.com, Ungrind.org, StartMarriageRight.com, and more. She has a M.A. in Communication from Regent University and serves as associate producer for Soul Check TV.
Check out fantastic resources on Faith, Family, and Fun at Crosswalk.com!
Related Resource: 3 Simple Steps to Manage Your Emotions
Are you tired of up-and-down feelings stealing your peace, sabotaging your relationships, and filling your mind with self-defeating thoughts? What if you had a proven emotional management tool to biblically respond to your feelings with compassion and clarity? Join us for today’s episode to discover three simple steps to manage emotions, reduce stress, improve decision-making, and grow closer to God. If you like what you hear, be sure to subscribe to The Love Offering on Apple or Spotify so you never miss an episode!
