How to Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude in Your Marriage - Crosswalk PLUS Marriage Devotional
How to Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude in Your Marriage
By: Alicia Searl
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Colossians 3:1
As I type this, I am 30,000 feet in the air, headed toward Jackson Hole, Wyoming. We just flew over the Rockies, and oh my, it was a stunning view. My husband sits next to me in the aisle (a place he doesn’t necessarily prefer), but because I am a very nervous flyer and he knows I love to look out the window, he happily obliged.
Tomorrow we will celebrate twenty-two years of marriage! Quite honestly, it feels a little surreal, as we are closing in on that midway point where we have been married longer than we haven’t. In many ways, I can’t even recall what my life was like without him.
So, we desperately needed this trip—not just to honor our years together but to cultivate an attitude of gratitude, as the past few years have come with some major hurt and heartache. Between raising a wayward teenager and suffering the significant loss of a few close loved ones, grace and gratefulness somehow got lost in the sea of deception and grief.
The truth is that life will always have certain stressors that can lead to a mixture of unwelcome emotions, including anxiety, depression, comparison, complacency, or disappointment. This is sadly a playground for the enemy, because when we are already knocked down, he can use our negative thoughts and emotions to slowly unravel what God so beautifully brought together.
Thankfully, God gave us the template for marriage, which holds both a beautiful plan and significant purpose. As we submit to Christ, only then can we serve one another in love and have hearts that are willing (and ready) to show gratitude. God wants us to view our marriage through a realistic and spiritual lens, so we don’t aim for perfection but seek sanctification.
Take a moment to pause and reflect on the nature of your marriage. Are you thriving as a couple or barely hanging on? What are your current life stressors? How is your attitude towards your spouse?
Friend, if you are struggling to see the beauty and blessings in your marriage, invite Christ into your heart this season and ask for His peace and to help you see your union as one filled with a beautiful purpose and precious promise. Let God’s divine plan for your marriage prompt you to give Him thanks (Colossians 3:1).
When we shift our focus off our current circumstances and place our hearts in Jesus’ hands, He will give us the means to find peace and hold a space to be thankful. How can you show your spouse you are thankful for them?
Here are a few ideas to get you started:
Flash an unexpected tender and loving smile.
Send an enduring text in the middle of the day.
Say thank you for even the simplest tasks.
Greet your spouse warmly.
Write them a love letter.
Put your phone down and listen attentively.
Bring home an unexpected gift.
Honor and acknowledge their feelings.
Consider your spouse’s love language and what may be meaningful for them. Sharing simple acts of kindness towards our other half can really do wonders for our marriage while also slowly changing us and giving us a godly perspective. How sweet is that?
Prayer:
Father, thank you for the gift You so graciously give to us in a marriage. While it is so easy to take this sacred relationship for granted, as we bend to unhealthy emotions or succumb to current circumstances, we ask that You check our hearts and enable us to see the hope and peace You so graciously extend to us. Lead and guide us this season, and help us hold a heart of thankfulness that longs to submit to You and serve our spouse in genuine love. Change and grow us in the meantime to be the spouse You are calling us to be. Cultivate an attitude of gratitude within us that sees our spouse the way that You do, as deeply and dearly loved. I ask this in Your holy name. Amen.
Application:
How is God calling you to let His peace rule in your marriage? Reflect on any areas of stress or disconnection where you can invite Christ's peace and healing.
What specific prayer can you pray over your spouse and marriage this season? Think about areas where you desire God’s guidance, healing, or growth for both of you.
Alicia Searl is a devotional author, blogger, and speaker that is passionate about pouring out her heart and pointing ladies of all ages back to Jesus. She has an education background and master’s in literacy. Her favorite people call her Mom, which is why much of her time is spent cheering them on at a softball game or dance class. She is married to her heartthrob (a tall, spiky-haired blond) who can whip up a mean latte. She sips that goodness while writing her heart on a page while her puppy licks her feet. Visit her website at aliciasearl.com and connect with her on Instagram and Facebook.
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