Love Your Wives Like Yourselves - Crosswalk PLUS Marriage Devotional
Love Your Wives Like Yourselves
By: Michelle Lazurek
"In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself." Ephesians 5:28
Feeling bad about life's circumstances, I went to God during my quiet time. I cried out to him as always. But there was still a sadness in my soul. Dealing with heavy emotions is a process, and sometimes it can be a long, arduous process. When the emotional pain got to be too much to bear, I defaulted to a source of comfort for me—a plate of macaroni and cheese and a bowl of ice cream. As I swallowed the freezing cold peanut butter chocolatey goodness, it soothed the ache in my soul, for a time. That was, until the pain of my circumstances came back into my mind, and I looked for a self- soothing strategy to assuage the sadness welling inside of me once again.
While there's nothing wrong with the occasional plate of warm comfort food, this is just one of many coping strategies we use to cover up the deeper issues in our souls—or in our marriages. Clinging to food, retail therapy, or binge-watching our favorite TV show to numb emotional and mental pain is widely accepted by society, yet it can be detrimental to a marriage if we are not careful. The above verse is important because it tells us that as a husband respects and cares for his own body, he should care for and respect his wife. However, when we use coping strategies like the ones listed above, we fail to care for our bodies as God intended. Simply because these are widely accepted both in and out of the church does not mean they are the strategies we should lean on in times of trouble.
A husband who loves their body loves their wife. The person who abuses their body with food, drugs or alcohol cannot possibly love his wife. My husband needs to love his wife the same way he loves himself. This passage in Ephesians continues to say he must love his wife enough to sacrifice himself for her. He must give himself up for her as Christ did for the church. This means a man must make sacrifices to love his wife fully. He puts her first in his life. Her needs and wants come first before anything he wants or needs.
When a husband is selfish and mistreats himself, he will, in the same way, mistreat his wife. But as he cares for himself, exercises, eats right, drinks water, and gets enough rest, he demonstrates not only to himself but to the world that he is worthy of love. Therefore, he not only loves himself, but he loves others God has entrusted to him, including his wife. The number one person that should be put first in his life is his wife. When a husband mistreats his body, that means he is putting his own selfish needs and desires ahead of doing what's right so that she can be edified.
Husbands, put down that bowl of ice cream. Stop using self- sabotaging behaviors to destroy your body, zap your mental energy and fill emotional voids that can only be filled by Christ. Instead of filling your bowl with ice cream or filling your mind with mindless television, fill your mind with the word of God. Cling to it in moments of trial. Pray and ask God to take care of not only you but also your wife. A man who gives over his body to the Lord and makes sacrifices to keep it healthy will also do so to make sacrifices to ensure his marriage is healthy. Be the man who goes to God and allows God to take care of everything. The most proactive thing a husband can do is to give his life over to God. When God has been placed as a proper priority in your life, you can then lead with confidence and love your wife as Christ loved the church.
Father, help us not cling to the world's strategies to dull the ache in our souls. Let us instead come to you for our help. Help husbands love their wives enough to treat themselves as well as they would treat their own bodies. Amen.
Application Questions:
Why do you think Paul draws this parallel from a man who loves his wife to one that loves his own body?
Have you ever thought about how you love your wife as a direct result of how much you love yourself?
What way can you love your wife today?
We hope you and your spouse are challenged and encouraged by today's devotional! For more of this premium marriage devotional, visit here.
