The Man I Wanted to Marry. The Man I Considered Marrying. The Man I Married. - iBelieve Truth: A Devotional for Women - October 21, 2024

“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21 

Hallmark movies are all about choosing the right man. Many of the films portray a girl in a relationship with a guy who turns out not to be “Mr. Right” for her. As complicated as some situations are in the films, these dating dilemmas are usually resolved in two hours or less, but in real life, it might take a little longer.

During high school, I dated a boy from 9th grade to the beginning of senior year. In my heart, he was definitely the one I wanted to marry. There was no doubt in my mind that he was the one I wanted, even though I wasn’t sure he had given his life to Jesus. Even though he faithfully attended church with his family, he hadn’t ever spoken of knowing Christ in a personal way.

However, I carried around the gnawing feeling that he wasn’t the one God wanted for me. As hard as I could, I tried to ignore, deny, and pray against this feeling, but it wouldn’t leave me.

In my heart, I knew it was God letting me know it wasn’t going to work out for the long run, but still I resisted His gentle, ongoing promptings.

Looking back, I don’t believe God was trying to take something away from me or hurt me in any way. Actually, it was the opposite; He was trying to spare me pain and let me know He had other plans for me.

But my stubborn heart hung on to my dream as long as possible until it did come to an end that left me feeling devastated and my future hopes dashed.

Throughout my dating in high school, there was this other sweet boy I knew liked me in a way I could see leading to marriage. But as far as I knew, he wasn’t a Christian. 

Although he was kind, funny, and reliable, I still had strong feelings for the boy I was dating. But still, there seemed a real possibility of a future marriage with him, which appealed to me at the time.

Yet, my heart just wasn’t invested, having strong feelings for my current boyfriend. And, even though I didn’t want to disappoint or hurt him, I didn’t want to lead him on either.

Like a Hallmark movie plays out, God kept pointing out the man, or boy at the time, I would marry. He let me see him in the most obvious way, but as a junior high girl, I just wasn’t sure what it meant at the time.

Although he had caught my eye from junior high on, I rarely saw him, except for a history class where he moved from the last chair in the row behind me, to sitting right behind me. I enjoyed his classroom banter to me throughout the classes and even pondered choosing him over my boyfriend at the time but was too emotionally attached at the time.

Then, after the heartbreaking breakup in high school, God orchestrated for us to both show up at a friend’s wedding. Like a scene from a movie, as I walked in the door of the reception with my friend, I saw him, and the words just poured out from my mouth, saying, “I love Phil Kittle.”

Phil was known around school as a “Jesus Freak,” one who passionately loved God and made sure to let everyone know he did and told them how they could know Jesus, too. Wearing his homemade cross necklace around his neck and carrying his Bible everywhere, his faith in God was hard to miss.

Still, in the moment, at the wedding reception, it surprised me and must have surprised my friend, too, but not God. Like a good Hallmark movie, God was setting us up over the years to meet again in that moment, and from there it became a happily-ever-after Hallmark ending and new beginning.

My husband doesn’t mind my retelling the story, as he loves being the one God chose for me and hearing how God had plans for us. Just like God tells us in 2 Timothy 1:9, “He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done but because of His own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time.”

Let’s Pray:

Dear Father, 

Lead us today to follow Your plan for our lives. Help our hearts to align with Your heart in the paths we choose to take and the decisions we make.

In Jesus’ name, 

Amen

Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Vasil Dimitrov

Lynette Kittle is married with four daughters. She enjoys writing about faith, marriage, parenting, relationships, and life. Her writing has been published by Focus on the Family, Decision, Today’s Christian Woman, kirkcameron.com, Ungrind.org, StartMarriageRight.com, and more. She has a M.A. in Communication from Regent University and serves as associate producer for Soul Check TV.

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