“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” (Ephesians 4:2-3, NIV)
These verses and our marital promises look perfectly applicable and fulfillable in the gold script of our wedding programs and pictures that hold the smiles and love that permeated the day we said, “I do.” Though no one walks down the aisle intending for it all to fall apart, marriages are shattered daily. Paul’s advice to the Ephesians is hard to live out in daily life, especially when reality doesn’t align with the pages of marital bliss we read through while planning our futures.
When the bottom falls out, and our trust is wiped off the map of our marriages, these verses look like impossibilities and unrealistic expectations. Putting another person in the light of this verse knocks if off-skew. We were never meant to worship another person, nor seek safety and completion in one. Two become one in marriage, but marriage itself is a reflection of God’s love for His church. His love for us. Christ in us comes first, and when it doesn’t, the rest of our relationships are set up to derail.
There are no perfect solutions to fix broken marriages. We live in a broken world full of broken people, broken promises, and broken trust. But there is One who can be trusted. One Whose promises are always fulfilled. One who loves us for who we are, right where we are …brokenness and all. In moments of marital agony, heartbreak, and suffering, we are never alone. One day at a time, one prayer at a time, He will pull us through to the future we cannot see.
Don’t be quick to write the conclusion before He’s finished speaking, and know that even if the worst happens, He is still God. He is still good. And we are still loved.
Let's say a marriage prayer together and ask God to heal what is broken.
Download your own personal copy of Prayers for Your Marriage HERE. Print these and keep them by your bedside and with you throughout the day to remember to pray for your relationship and spouse.
Father,
Sovereign, omnipotent, all-knowing. These are the big and complicated words that describe who You are. Never fully able to grasp how deep and wide and long Your love is for us, we humbly praise You today for who You are. Whether or not we meet you in moments of clarity or confusion, You are God. You are good. You are sovereign, omnipotent, all-knowing. When the world is unfair to us You are fair to defend us. As we unravel, You rewind the spool. What we cannot see, You have already gone before and prepared for us.
So good are You God, that even when no words or feelings of joy are flitting to the surface or permeating our minds, the Holy Spirit is faithful to stir in us three words of hope: “Don’t give up.”
Father, we understand that we live in a broken world, and sometimes marriage doesn’t flesh out in the way You purposed it to. We fail each other and fail You, so often. But miraculously, You love us no less. You never give up on us. It’s never too late, even when we feel it’s too late for our marriages. We’re feeling that way, today, Father – like it’s too late. We are ready to throw our arms in the air and give up. We feel given up on, misunderstood, and hurt beyond repair.
When trust has been broken into too many pieces to glue back together, how do we come back together?
The hurt and pain in our hearts threatens to squeeze our eyes dry of tears, and the misery of loneliness fills the air even when in good company. Chipped and stripped, lost and lonely, we revisit our wedding vows and weep for what has been tainted and torn. Peace seems to elude us. Harmony is on the run. All we have left is to run to Your capable arms and weep at Your feet for what to do next.
Today, we give our marriages to You. Forgive us for putting them and our spouses before You. Forgive us for putting ourselves as well as our desires and plans for the future before You and Yours.
Search our hearts, Lord. Convict us and clear out all the hardness and ick that is clogging up the flow of Love in our lives. Reset our relationship with You. Restore our hope in Jesus Christ and open our minds and hearts to the healing truth that only He can rush into our lives in these moments of madness.
Give us the strength to be brave. Replace the fear of what might happen and what the future might hold with Christ-centered courage. We can’t be strong right now. We are broken and barely breathing. But You, the living God, in us, are our strength.
Through the Holy Spirit of the One True God, empower us with humility, gentleness, patience, peace, and unity (Ephesians 4:2-3). Curb our anger from morphing into bitterness and hatred. Forgive us for the times we lose our tempers and our sanity towards our spouse.
“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace.” (Ephesians 4:2-3, NIV)
Father, these things in Ephesians seem impossible right now. All of the things these verses say are things we cannot do apart from You. But we vow today, to have faith in You. We promise to trust You through the brokenness and heartbreak, trusting that it will not last forever. The process of forgiveness will begin in our hearts this very moment, but we will leave restoration and reconciliation in Your hands.
Take it all – our marriage and our lives. We have come to the end of ourselves and the ability to repair what has been broken in ourselves, our spouses, and our marriages. We are taking a backseat to Your sovereignty. Break it all if you must, in order to restore completely what has been lost. As we walk through the unknown state of our futures, we are believing You for who You say You are.
“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.’” (Jeremiah 29:11-13, NIV)
Come Lord Jesus. Into our lives with miraculous healing.
In Jesus’ Name,
Amen.
For more verses to pray over your marriage, click here.
Photo Credit: Thinkstock/Vasyl Dolmatov