4 Comforting Ways to Pray and Respond During Times of Grief
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- Updated Feb 01, 2024
I think about death sometimes, maybe more than the average person, but most days pass without any experience. I hear about people dying on the news and know people who know someone who’s died, but I don’t usually lose anyone in my life. Until I do. When that happens, I am again reminded of the ephemeral nature of life. Jesus wasn’t exaggerating when He said, “For you are like vapor that appears for a little while, then vanishes” (James 4:14, CSB). We can go through life accomplishing nothing of value or living life as successfully as we can, but in the end, we all die. We’re gone. And once those who knew us pass on, there won’t be any obvious signs of us left. This is cause for grief in the moment but leaves room for finding hope in the Lord.
“If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. Therefore, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.” (Romans 14:8)
Last week, one of my great-uncles passed away. We were not very close, but close enough that I felt the loss. Cried even. He had a knack for charging you money whenever he dropped tidbits of wisdom, even unsolicited. That and his overall sense of humor made him pleasant to be around. When he passed, I thought about all that he left behind. A wife, children, grandchildren, pets. Then, I considered what he took with him. Wisdom, knowledge, a fear of the Lord.
When people die, life drastically changes. Expectations of seeing people you barely keep in touch with diminish. And suddenly, I wondered if I should have spent more time getting to know him. Perhaps I should spend more time getting to know people in general. No day is guaranteed for any of us.
The loss of life is certainly one of the most significant experiences any of us will encounter. We are changed by death. While Scripture helps us figure out how we should respond, our human and sinful tendencies could lead us elsewhere. Whether you’re grieving the loss of a loved one, a relationship, a job, or something else entirely, seek God throughout the entire process. There’s no one who cares about you more or who possesses greater wisdom and power. He can comfort and lead you into a brighter tomorrow.
The next time grief sets in, look to these responses and prayers for comfort.
4 Responses to Grief
1. Pray
We can find great comfort in Scripture with verses like “The Lord is near the brokenhearted; he saves those crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18). And with these verses, we also find motivation to pray even when the sorrow tells us to be silent in our weeping. If we want to find God’s presence during our hardship, we simply need to call out to Him, and keep calling out. Prayer will not remove whatever void and hurt we feel, but talking to God gives us direction for how to handle the emotions and what to do moving forward. Moreover, praying reminds us that if no one else in the world cares about what we’re going through, God does. He always will.
2. Read the Bible
The only way to find and know verses that center us on God is to read the Bible. The more we know Him, the more we come to trust that He is for us. He loves us and meets our needs, especially when we’re brokenhearted. Oftentimes, when tragedy hits, we spend time asking Him why and spend time worrying about what the future will look like. Knowing Scripture will help alleviate those concerns, because we will know that the Lord will take care of us. No matter what.
3. Connect with Others
Certain forms of suffering tempt us to spend time alone, isolated away from other people. This happens because we want to maintain a facade of never being sad. Others are too prideful to show a vulnerable side. Even worse, in our isolation, we may indulge in destructive habits, hoping to self-medicate the pain. The healthier alternative is to find community. Connecting with other people means less time spent alone with our own anxieties and pain. If we want someone to listen to us vent, we can do that, and they can even offer us a shoulder to cry on. Life is already difficult. Finding someone to help us bear burdens makes things easier.
4. Serve Others
Unsurprisingly, serving others more leads to less thinking of ourselves. And thinking of ourselves less has a way of shrinking the pain of our suffering. By no means should you evade or dismiss your grief. Feeling emotions makes us human and reveals how much we care about someone or something. Instead, we should make sure we take care not to dwell in the sorrow. Feel the pain, but don’t stay there. Serving others helps us achieve just that.
4 Prayers for Grief
Lost Relationships
Lord,
I know many people who are struggling with lost relationships right now. People have died from sickness, and others have been divorced. Many friendships have been tested and broken in recent years. I ask that you bring comfort to those who are suffering and to those who are seeking you in this time of need.
Losing someone you care about is hard, and sometimes, we don’t see a way forward. But where the road seems to end, I pray that you will help us to keep going. Give direction to those who need a way forward. Remind them that you love them and that you provide.
I pray that within the church, we will do more to reach out to those who are hurting. The widows and widowers. The orphans and the parents who have lost children. I pray especially for the singles who do not have a spouse or family they can readily depend on when they go home every day. Please help us to not forget any of them.
In Jesus name, amen.
Lost Job
Lord,
There’s a certain hurt that comes with losing a job, especially when being let go unjustly. Losing income breeds insecurity financially and emotionally. But I know that our confidence, even financially, should come from you. So, I want to pray for those who are in this very situation right now. For the parents struggling to make ends meet. For that single man or woman who’s just trying to get by. Please make a way for them during these difficult times. Bless them with wisdom for effectively handling money and help them also find opportunities to make more income. Even in the midst of uncertainty, you, Lord, remain certain. Thank you. Amen.
Loss of Opportunities
God,
I’ve missed out on more than a few opportunities during my lifetime. I’ve skipped out on things due to fear, procrastination, and sin. What’s in the past is in the past, but I pray that moving forward, I will live with you in mind. Give me the courage to try new things, to tackle what I’ve been afraid of doing before. I pray for more opportunities to serve you, others, to spread the Gospel, to perform work for meaning, and to simply live a life of purpose. Life is so short, I definitely want to make the most of what you have given me. Amen.
Loss of a Loved One
God,
Right now, I feel the sting of losing someone I loved dearly. There’s an emptiness that lingers, a pain that just can’t be fixed. While I’m grateful for the support others in my life have given, none of it takes away what happened. I’m sad. I cry. I struggle day by day. I have no idea when this hurt will end, if ever, but I do know that you love me. And in your love for me, you promise to be near. So, Lord, please be with me during this time. Help me to smile when I don’t want to smile, to eat even when I don’t want to eat. Please don’t let me dwell in this sorrow forever. Rescue me, God, and restore brightness to my eyes.
In Jesus' name. Amen.
Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/kaipong
Get in touch with him at aarondanthony.com and check out his debut short story anthology Honey Dreams on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.
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