3 Biblical Truths for the Impatient and Frustrated Single

And best of all, “Don’t worry about it. It’s not a big deal,” from someone who is already married or couldn’t care less about ever being so.

The advice we hear isn’t always wrong, though it isn’t always right either. Sometimes what we actually want isn’t advice. We want actions, not words. In essence, we want change. Yet, no YouTube video, podcast, church elder, friend, or stranger can necessarily give us that. They don’t control our lives. Not only that, but they can’t tell us what we want to hear because they don’t know what we desperately want to know.

Will I Be Single Forever?

If the mere discussion of singleness bothers you, know that you’re not alone. I recently watched a YouTube video about why modern dating for Christian men feels impossible, and instantly regretted my decision. Not only did I learn nothing new, my impatience and frustration with this stage of life was renewed. I was back to asking God, what now?

What now? You wonder for yourself.

There’s nothing I can tell you that you don’t already know. I feel for you, whether you are in your twenties or your forties, trying to cling to your virginity and Christian values, while at the same time feeling left behind. The days tick by, and the years. People might ignore that fact, but you can’t.

If they were in our shoes, who wouldn’t feel impatient or frustrated? Who wouldn’t feel like their singleness is never-ending?

No. There’s nothing new to tell you about singleness. Not when you already feel like no one understands, and perhaps everyone of the opposite sex is conspiring against you. Maybe you think God Himself is too, at least with this area of life. I get it.

While there’s nothing new to tell you, there is something you should remember. Something you will have to remind yourself time and time again. Something the ‘perpetually single’ are prone to forget - who God is.

There’s plenty to say about God’s character, but as you navigate singleness, struggle, and learn to thrive in this season of life, there are three truths you should keep recalling as needed. You already know them, but when singleness feels like a curse rather than a blessing, take that as a sign that you’ve forgotten and spend some time reminding yourself.

Here are three truths for the impatient and frustrated single:

Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/Wavebreakmedia

1. God Loves You

“We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19)

From what I hear, the love of a spouse can be intoxicating, in both a good and bad way. However, what you and I know is that God’s love for us is incomparable to any husband or wife and only good. His love cannot be fully understood and yet, we know that there is no person or being of any kind who loves us more. No one has or will make a greater sacrifice or give better gifts. The only reason you and I know love or understand it is because of Him. Keep that in mind as you yearn for the touch or company of a spouse. Those desires are good, and godly, but there is a love to relish in while you wait. Love that will sustain you day by day, hour by hour.

2. God Will Give You Enough 

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me. (2 Corinthians 12:9)

There’s no empty platitude or cliche I can give you about leaning into your current relationships and continuing to put yourself out there. You know all that. What I want you to remember though, are the words God gave to Paul. God only knows why you’re single and how long the season will last. Rely on him for grace. Thinking of the future can be overwhelming and discouraging, especially when we become advanced in age. Just focus on today, and when tomorrow comes, focus on tomorrow. God will get you through whatever you face, in this life or the next.

3. You’re Alone, but Not Actually

“Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord cares for me.” (Psalm 27:10)

There’s nothing fun about divorce, or breaking up, or longing for a relationship but never having one. When people come into our lives, we often want them to stay, but sometimes going is the best option. Remind yourself that while people are fickle and relationships change, God never will. Even if our parents gave up on us, or our ex, or a friend, or a boss, whoever, God still loves us. He still cares.

You may feel alone, but you are never truly alone. You never will be. You know that.

You know everything I’ve already mentioned, but today, remind yourself. The next time you feel impatient, remind yourself. Frustrated? Remind yourself. So long as you are a human experiencing human emotions, remind yourself.

Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/fizkes 

Aaron D'Anthony Brown is a freelance writer, hip-hop dance teacher, and visual artist, living in Virginia. He currently contributes to Salem Web Network’s Crosswalk platform and supports various clients through the freelancing website Upwork. He's an outside-the-box thinker with a penchant for challenging the status quo. 

Get in touch with him at aarondanthony.com and check out his debut short story anthology Honey Dreams on Amazon and Barnes and Noble.