9 Helpful Tips for Handling Difficult Days
- Denise Kohlmeyer Crosswalk.com Contributing Writer
- Updated Mar 28, 2024
Difficult days happen. As you’re going to work, you discover your car won’t start. Your child is acting up at school again and the principle called. You had an argument with your spouse. You missed a deadline at work, and it set back an important project. Your aging parent got a devastating diagnosis. Your finances are nearly drained, and the bills are piling up. You’re being bullied at school, and you feel as if no one cares about you, much less likes you.
Yes, difficult days happen. How do you handle them, though? What is your go-to way of coping with a singular tough situation or an entire day? Where do you turn for hope and help?
1. Pray
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)
As with every day, but especially on your most difficult and challenging days, you can count on having God’s undivided attention. His ears are always open to your cries, petitions, pleas, and confessions. As a loving, caring Father, God desires nothing else but for you, his precious child, to bring your burdens and anxieties to him, because he cares for you deeply and dearly.
2. Claim His Promises
God is the Great Promise Keeper. Not one of his promises ever failed toward Israel; every one of them was fulfilled (Joshua 21:45). That hasn’t changed since ancient times, either. His promises are just as true and trustworthy for us today.
Here are a few—personalized for your benefit—that you can claim to help sustain and encourage you throughout a difficult day:
Lamentations 3:22-23: “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases [toward me]; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning [and every minute]; great is your faithfulness.”
Psalm 46:1: “God is [my] refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.”
Isaiah 41:10: “[I will] not fear, for [God is] with [me]; [I will] not be dismayed, for…God will strengthen [me] and help [me]; [You] will uphold [me] with [Your] righteous right hand.”
Psalm 34:18: “The Lord is close to [my brokenheart] and saves [me who is] crushed in spirit.”
2 Corinthians 1:3: Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts [me] in all [my] affliction.”
His mercies are new every day, every hour, every moment. He will surround you with his ministering angels in times of stress and distress. He will restore you with the joy of his salvation and eternal hope when all looks bleak.
For some specific prayers to pray, please read Whitney Hopler’s article “5 Prayer for Difficult Times.”
3. Count Your Blessings
“All the days of the afflicted are bad, but a cheerful heart has a continual feast” (Proverbs 15:15 NASB).
During a difficult day (or difficult situation), you have two choices: to give into your bad mood or to focus your thoughts on the blessings you have in God. Choose the latter. And if it helps, make a list of what you enjoy in life (physically, emotionally, and spiritually because of the goodness of God. Then, let this “continual feast” of blessings sustain and satisfy you throughout your day.
4. Sing
Studies have shown that singing is good for one’s mental health as it increases oxytocin levels (a hormone associated with well-being) and decreases cortisol, thereby lowering your stress, resulting in an improved mood. In this way, singing acts like a natural anti-depressant.
Here are a few hymns and contemporary songs that will help lift your spirits, if not by singing them, then at least by listening to them:
“In Christ Alone”
“Great is Thy Faithfulness”
“How Great is Our God”
“It is Well with My Soul”
“You Are Beautiful Beyond Description”
“Amazing Grace”
“What a Friend We Have in Jesus”
“Give Me Jesus”
“Hills and Valleys” by Tauren Wells
“Surrounded” by Michael W. Smith
“Thy Will” by Hillary Scott
“Oh, My Soul” by Casting Crowns
“I Can Only Imagine” by MercyMe
5. Talk
While we know our first go-to is God, it isn’t wrong to call a trusted, believing family member, friend, or pastor to talk to and hear a word of sympathy and encouragement. We are community-created people, and we need each other, more so on days when life throws us challenges.
Talking is also cathartic as we verbalize our emotional pain, frustration, and disappointment. Even naming our feelings (“I’m so anxious/scared/angry/etc.”) is said to help release them. In vocalizing our feelings “we become less reactive and more mindfully aware,” says Diane E Dreher Ph.D.
In truth, talking with another believer fulfills God’s will of helping us “bear one another’s burdens” (Galatians 6:2). So, go ahead, and pick up that phone.
6. Journal
Similar to talking, some find writing about their difficulties to be just cathartic, as well. Journaling also allows for privacy when you may not be ready, for whatever reason, to disclose to another person whatever is bothering you.
As with talking, journaling your thoughts and emotions helps to improve mental stress. Seeing your dilemma on paper gives you time and space to contemplate and put things in perspective. Journaling can also help bring new light or insight to a complicated situation.
7. Get Active
The effects of physical exertion have similar results as singing. Physical exertion of any kind increases the production of your brain’s feel-good neurotransmitters, called endorphins, as well as reduces the stress hormones, adrenaline and cortisol.
Physical activity also helps improve thinking and cognition, which, again, can help you put things in perspective and give you better clarity.
8. Eat and Sleep
If ever there was someone who had a difficult day, it was Elijah. In First Kings we read how he had the 450 prophets of Baal slaughtered in the brook Kishon (1 Kings 18:1-40). When Queen Jezebel heard about it, she was furious and sent word to Elijah, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them” (1 Kings 19:2).
That was no idle threat. Jezebel meant to make good on it, and Elijah knew it. In verse three, we see that he “was afraid and he ran for his life.” He ran for an entire day into the desert, finally collapsing under a broom tree. In his exhaustion and foul mood, he cried to God, “I have had enough, Lord. Take my life.” Then he fell mercifully asleep, only to be woken up later by an angel who provided him with bread and water. Elijah ate and drank, then promptly “lay down again.” When he woke again, the Lord provided more food, saying, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you” (1 Kings 19:7).
How gracious and compassionate the Lord was to Elijah. Sleep and food were God’s good and gracious gifts for the weary, cranky prophet. God knew Elijah needed physical sustenance to restore his body and a good nap to refresh his mind and spirit.
While not many of us are under the threat of death as Elijah was, the principle of his story applies just the same. Our journeys—even daily—may be too much for us to cope with. In these instances, God encourages us to eat sustaining food and take a refreshing nap to restore and rejuvenate our minds, bodies, and spirits.
For a more comprehensive understanding of God’s perspective on this topic, read Dawn Wilson’s insightful article, “Sleep, the Bible, and Why You Should Really Take a Nap.”
9. Sit in Silence
There are times when you need to shut out the noise of self and the noise of the world. Sitting in silence enables you to do that. It enables you to settle yourself internally, block out the external noise (as much as possible), and calm those racing thoughts. Silence gives you the space you need to quiet your anger, frustration, and confusion so that we can hear God speak comfort, peace, and hope into our hurting hearts (Psalm 62:5).
“When I listen, when I let You start the conversation, all my questions disintegrate into affection.” (Prayer Volume 02, Strahan Coleman, “Beholding.”)
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Fizkes
