How Self-Help Culture Is Stealing Your Dependence on God
There is no doubt that there is an obsession with self today, especially in matters of self-improvement. Social media is filled to the brim with such content while we also see bookstores with plenty of works related to self-help. We even see it in the context of the church, where the sermon is tailored to self-improvement, with the pastor coming off more like a life coach and motivational speaker.
Sharon Hodde, author of The Cost of Control, notes the increased self-obsession that is prevalent in our world today.
"There's a cultural obsession right now with controlling our inner world—our thoughts, our habits, our emotions," she said. "But it can become this exhausting, endless pursuit of trying to fix ourselves without really knowing what wholeness even is."
I'm sure we have all fallen into this cycle, myself included, where we are seeking out that one thing that will ultimately bring happiness because we were able to improve ourselves. That even applies to us Christians, where we think if we listen to that one sermon or read that one book, then all our problems will be solved, we will have the healing (physical, emotional, spiritual) we desired or that we would have an unwavering relationship with God where we are always spiritually motivated. Reality, however, says otherwise.
The Endless Pursuit of Self-Help
Hodde rightly notes that this pursuit can become "an exhausting, endless pursuit of trying to fix ourselves without knowing what wholeness even is." Although we have good intentions of wanting to improve ourselves daily, the danger is that we let that become the end all be all of our lives rather than living for the Lord and glorifying Him in all things. When God is out of the equation, all we have left is attempting to pull ourselves up by our own bootstraps, which is a burden that is never intended for us to bear. Plus, we know that apart from God, the heart is never satisfied, regardless of how many pursuits we take. Like the author of Ecclesiastes says, "Vanity of vanities! All is vanity".
Christ Alone Can Save Us
Not only is self, not the end all be all, but self does not save. No amount of self-improvement can absolve yourself from your sins. We need Christ! We need His righteousness, for He is the only one who makes us righteous and reconciles us to God the Father. As Acts 4:13 says, "And there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved." Only Christ can save, for He is the way, the truth, and the life, and no man can come to God the Father except through Him (John 14:6). Therefore, you can never self-improve yourself to eternal life, no matter how much you grow here on Earth.
Heart Transformation over Behavior Transformation
Additionally, self-improvement centers on behavior modification when we ultimately need heart transformation! As Jeremiah 17:9 says, "The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately sick; who can understand it?" Jeremiah notes that everyone has an issue, and that is a sinful heart. As we know, the heart is more than just a blood pumping muscle, but the center of one's being. It is where our sinful actions stem from (Matthew 15:19).
Therefore, the gospel is needed so that we would be given a heart of flesh over a heart of stone (Ezekiel 36:26-27) so that we would have a heart to love God with everything (Matthew 22:37). Sin is a heart issue that not even self-improvement can fix - only God can fix it.
Finding True Rest in God Alone
"You have made us for Yourself; our hearts are restless until they find rest in You." - Augustine of Hippo.
In closing, let us consider this quote famously said by Augustine of Hippo. In understanding that matter we have been discussing, we must understand these two things: 1) We were made for God, and 2) our hearts only find rest in Him. As stated earlier, the ongoing pursuit of self-improvement only leads to restlessness and burnout, whereas in God, we truly find rest and salvation. I pray that pastors would return to sound biblical exposition rather than just cater to the world's message of self-improvement, for it is not the end all be all. Besides, we are made in the image of God (Genesis 1:26); hence, we are made for Him, not ourselves. There is no greater privilege in the world than to be a child of God and to live a life devoted to Him. Rather than live life to the fullest, in accordance with self, live life to the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:13). Now, that is a life that is truly worth living to the fullest.
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Brothers91
Originally published April 09, 2025.
