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What to Do When We Feel God Is Gone

What to Do When We Feel God Is Gone

I can tell you about a time when I thought my fellowship with God had gone dry. I was in junior high or my early high school days. I remember feeling that my prayer to the Lord were met with silence. Here’s the question I didn’t ask before I fretted: Is there anything of Jesus— His Word, His leading, what outside counsel is telling me—that I am neglecting?

This has become a regular question now in my times of fellowship with Jesus: is there anything I am neglecting or avoiding, but shouldn’t? Often times, this question uncovers a way Jesus wants to help me, such as an area I very much desire help in when I look at it through the viewpoint of His omnipotence and everlasting care. This question typically uncovers a way I have neglected or forgotten to ask for help.

This question is something like what the psalmist prays: tell me of my hidden sins, self-reliance being the sin.

I don’t want to “handle” life on my own. But often, that’s unfortunately my default standing. What helps my memory is basic, simple Bible teaching. Walking through Scripture step-by-step makes me think of other saints and how they tried, and failed, to “correct” their circumstances themselves. God’s leading in the lives of His saints is real, and we can know it if we aren’t neglecting to come before Him with all of our lives and hearts — withholding nothing.

Here are some examples of prayers for not neglecting or avoiding God in our lives: 

- Jesus, is there any way I should be picking up and following you, but am not?

- Jesus, are there any ways I should be casting my burdens on you, know you are for me, but am not?

- Jesus, is there any circumstance that feels too difficult for me, and I am not trusting you with it because I forget that with God all things are possible?

- Jesus, am I withholding any of my heart from you, even knowing you want it all, like a beautifully jealous husband?  

- Jesus, are there any people I am failing to love selflessly?

- Jesus, am I fearing you rightly? Am I afraid to come before you as a sinner, not realizing that it’s your good grace for me that leads to holy awe being formed in me?

- Jesus, am I looking to things or people for my joy, acceptance, or hope, when that’s the role you want in my life?

- Jesus, am I doubting your character — your love that is constant and faithful? Do I think I have lost your love because I have sinned against you?

- Jesus, are others who follow you giving me consistent counsel that I am avoiding because I don’t want to hear it? If so, is the counsel of you, or not? Guide me, I pray.

- Jesus, are you asking me to take a posture of service rather than self-fulfillment? If so, am I trusting you to fill me?

- Jesus, are you asking me to trust you even when I don’t feel you so that I “prove” my faithfulness through a test? Help me to be at peace, if this is what you are doing in my heart?

- Jesus, do I believe that you are in charge of my spiritual life and growth? Am I believing that you are leading me to good spiritual places in my spirit?

- Jesus, is there a sin that I am cherishing in my heart? If so, would you please reveal it as we look at my heart together through the lens of your great grace?

- Jesus, am I strong in belief, but you are calling me to believe in your truths more deeply? Help me know what you are pruning in me so that I can bear more fruit for you.

- Jesus, am I, with anxiety, keeping my true fears from you because I want to figure out my path by myself?

 - Jesus, I long to know you, so I am going to sit in silence and stillness, knowing that you are God. Please lead me in the way everlasting. I know that you are the Way. You will lead me into fellowship with you, so faithfully.

These are some ways we can ask God to hold and mold our hearts. It is good and faithful of us to search our hearts before the Lord. It is good to be known by God, to see that He is willing to search and probe us. The inspiring psalmist writes: “Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” (Psalm 139:23-24).

Perhaps Jesus’ silence is not due to anything you have neglected or are avoiding. Perhaps what you need is fresh, daily remembrance of His love and grace and mercy. Or perhaps — likely! — the two needs go hand-in-hand. We need to not overlook what Jesus wants to do in us, while being sweetly assured of His character.

The wonderful reality about a Savior like ours is that we are in a personal love relationship with Him. And He will never leave or forsake us because He cannot deny Himself. We who believe in His sacrifice for our sins are so thoroughly His by grace!

Jesus says that His character is to draw us near. And so perhaps as an overarching question, we can look at our beliefs. What are we thinking/believing to be true? If we believe in Jesus, in His character, then we know His heart is this: “how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing” (Luke 34:13).

If we believe that character of Jesus, then we have comfort. This is how He desires to be toward us, as a hen drawing her little chicks near in felt love and protection. He wants us to ask Him for help, to ask that He would build us up in our human weaknesses. Will we humble ourselves and turn our hearts toward Him in the silence so that we are willing to receive Him

It’s all about what we actually believe. So, if Jesus is less present, in a felt sense, but you believe His word about His graciousness and protective posture toward you — perhaps He is prodding you to believe more deeply such that you walk with Him more closely.

Examine and follow. Believe and follow. Listen and follow. Trust that Jesus is near, even when you question. See if you’re the one avoiding Him — instead of the other way around! And honor Him by believing the very great and precious promises of Scripture. Jesus has entrusted us with hearts and minds that are capable of belief, of increasing faith, and of making decisions about who we are and want to be. He is highly honored when we choose to trust and follow Him, even when it seems like He has gone. Surely and truly, He has not left or forsaken us, but He will pull us along, that we might know Him better. We draw near to God, and He will draw near to us.

More from this author
The Nearness of God in Our Waiting
He Is Willing to Help You Rest and Run
How Shall the Righteous Shall Live by Faith?

Photo credit: Unsplash/Averie Woodard

Lianna Davis is author of Keeping the Faith: A Study in Jude and Made for a Different Land: Eternal Hope for Baby Loss. She is also a contributor to We Evangelicals and Our Mission with Cascade Books. Lianna is a graduate of Moody Bible Institute and a student at The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. She lives in Illinois with her husband and daughter. You can learn more about her writing at her website.