To the Woman Who Feels She Is Not Enough

Editor's Note: This article is part of our Valentine's Love Letter series. Check out the previous letter here.

Dear Woman Who Feels She Isn't Enough,

It is exhausting trying to do it all. Just when you think you are starting to get a foothold on life, something comes along and completely knocks you off balance. Every day you do your best to please others, exceed expectations, and meet the needs of those around you. You spend countless hours, tireless, striving to perform, but you can’t help but feel you are failing at the end of the day. 

A quick scroll through social media, you quickly assert that you aren’t pretty enough, talented enough, wealthy enough; everyone else is thriving while you are struggling just to survive.

You still carry these last few pounds -- do you not care at all about how you look? Lazy.

That mom works, volunteers, and juggles a family -- why can't you do more? Incompetent.

Some days you don’t even read your Bible -- do you love the Lord? Hypocrite.

Friend, let me share the story of Rahab, filled with hidden spies and falling walls; it’s pretty exciting (Joshua 2). Rahab was a prostitute ( James 2:25 and Hebrews 11:31). Rahab could have hidden behind her reputation, making excuses for not being good enough to help Joshua’s men. No doubt she often felt worthless, perhaps believing that she was trapped in a sinful lifestyle, that God could never love or use someone like her. 

But Rahab did not allow Satan’s lies to paralyze her; through her faith and courage, she enlisted in God's plan to destroy Jericho and saved not only her life but also that of her family. Yes, you read that right; a prostitute helped achieve an enormous victory for God’s people. Oh, yeah, and another fun fact about Rahab “the prostitute”: David and Jesus both descended through her line. God always has a plan, and we are not useless or unworthy; we are daughters of a King!

Listen to these words from Isaiah 64:8, “Yet you, LORD, are our Father. We are the clay, and you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.” We are God’s clay, molded into His perfect design. Genesis tells us that man was created in His (God’s) image, which means we reflect some of His qualities. And 2 Corinthians 5:17 tells us that those who believe in Him will be made a new creation in Christ. Did you hear that? We are a new creation, made perfect through a saving relationship with Jesus Christ! Your identity is found in Christ alone, and you don’t have to wonder about your worth; Jesus gave his life for YOU!   

There is real, ongoing spiritual warfare all around us. To fight the enemy, we must actively pray, read, memorize, and recite the Word of God and apply it to our lives. If you find yourself constantly feeling worthless, falling into a dismal abyss of despair and discouragement, open your Bible, get on your knees, and cry out to God.  

Sister in Christ, if you wake up or go to bed feeling like a significant underachiever, even though you earnestly desire and plan otherwise, then rest assured that I, for one, understand and pray daily for you. I also pray for the Church, the Body of Believers in Christ worldwide. You are loved. You have a purpose. Place your identity and self-worth in the One who empowers you and me to do the impossible -- in Christ alone.

Sweet sister, let me lift you up in prayer:

Heavenly Father, please help those saints who feel that they are not enough. Give them eyes to see and ears to hear Your truth. Move them to embody your presence and love as they go about their lives. Help my sisters shift their temporal, self-demanding perspective to an eternal, Christ-honoring one. Let her live in victory in this realm, being an example to other women.

When she is tempted to speak hurtful words to herself, let her pause and think, “Is this what my Creator would say about me?” Let her be a woman who not only speaks the Truth into the lives of others but subscribes to them for herself. Help her to remember Proverbs 31:10, “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We love you, Lord. Thank you for sending Your Son, giving HIs life, so that we can have eternal salvation. 

In Jesus’ Name, Amen. 

I’ll close with a few verses to speak when those feelings of self-doubt creep in. Walking in light and rejoicing in Truth takes daily commitment, but you can do it; you have the power of Christ in you!

“For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with,[a] that we should no longer be slaves to sin— 7 because anyone who has died has been set free from sin.” ( Romans 6:6-7)

“But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” 1 Peter 2:9

“See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The world does not know us because it did not know him.  Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will have not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is.” ( 1 John 3:1-2)

Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/fizkes

Laura Bailey is an author and Bible teacher who encourages women to understand what they believe, why it matters, and how to apply biblical truths to their lives. Her recent book, Embracing Eternity in the Here and Now, explores how the timeless truths of Ecclesiastes help us live more peaceful, purposeful, and plentiful lives today.

She lives in Upstate South Carolina with her husband and three young girls, where she serves as director of women's ministries at her church. Her passion is teaching the Bible to women, equipping them to live with an eternal perspective. Invite Laura to speak at your next event or learn more: www.LauraRBailey.com connect on Facebook and Instagram.