Why Does God Compare Our Relationship with Him to That of a Bride and Groom?
- Jessica Brodie Award-winning Christian Novelist and Journalist
- Updated Jul 18, 2023
Jesus taught in parables as a way to help us understand his lessons more easily. He used figurative language rampant with similes, metaphors, and other literary techniques to bring the truth of the Gospel to life and help us relate and respond better.
He often referred to himself as the bridegroom, with the implied understanding that the church – his followers – was the bride. It’s a beautiful example, illustrating the tender and passionate care he has for us and the lengths to which he will go to gain and keep us.
Indeed, a study of the Bible shows that God has long used a loving, committed marriage as a way to describe our relationship with him. From the establishment of Adam and Eve to the wisdom and dedication God taught through the prophet Hosea’s marriage to an unfaithful prostitute, examples abound.
Why does God compare our relationship with him to that of a bride and groom?
In short, it’s a poignant and real-world way to exhibit the covenantal love and the selfless, everlasting stability God offers those of us who believe.
Why a Bride and Groom?
Weddings, as they often are today, were a big part of Jewish culture. Typically, a bride was betrothed to her bridegroom after the groom paid a set price, called a mohar, to the bride’s father. Weddings involved elaborate feasts, sometimes days of celebration, and then the woman would have been under the protection of her husband henceforth. She had an obligation to be loving, faithful, and supportive, while he had an obligation to care and provide for her.
While not every marriage was centered on romantic love, or eros, love was typically a component, whether that developed right away or over time. Other types of love were reflected in marriage and are still today, such as philia (love of friends and equals), storge (empathy or fondness love, such as love of parents for children), and agape (selfless, unconditional love for humanity).
But whether a marriage was cemented because of obligation and responsibility or because of genuine feelings of love, that marriage bond was important, then and now.
Given all this, a bride and groom are a great example of the relationship between us and God for a few reasons, from the commitment and dedication involved to the feelings and intimacy.
Where Does Jesus Call Himself the Bridegroom?
Jesus refers to himself as the bridegroom in three of the four Gospel accounts. In Matthew 9, when Jesus is questioned by John the Baptist’s followers about why they do not fast, Jesus asked, “How can the guests of the bridegroom mourn while he is with them? The time will come when the bridegroom will be taken from them; then they will fast” (Matthew 9:15).
This story is repeated in Mark 2:19-20, Luke 5:34-35, all three followed by his point that new wine cannot be poured into old wineskins but must be poured into new ones, meaning things are different now; the messiah has come.
He also uses a parable about a bridegroom and ten awaiting virgins, which is recounted in Matthew 25.
What Does Jesus’s Parable about the Bridegroom and the Ten Virgins Mean?
In Matthew 25:1-13, Jesus uses a parable to illustrate his larger point about being ready for his coming. In those days, much elaborate preparation went into wedding celebrations. Relatives and friends of the bride and groom played important roles in these celebrations. For instance, one tradition was that virgin female attendants would go to meet the bridegroom with oil lamps to light the way to the wedding banquet.
In Jesus’s parable, he shares how five of the women were wise and five were foolish. The wise ones brought not only their lamps but extra oil so they would be prepared when the bridegroom came. The foolish ones did not, and when they ran out of oil, they had to leave to get more — and missed the arrival of the bridegroom and all the festivities that followed. The door was closed to them.
We know Christ is our bridegroom. We also must be ready for his return, for — as the parable explains — "Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour” (Matthew 5:13).
Where Else Can We Find References to a Bride or Bridegroom?
God and his vast love for all creation is described as a bridegroom in Psalm 19:4-6, which rejoices about how God, and his light, “Is like a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, like a champion rejoicing to run his course. It rises at one end of the heavens and makes its circuit to the other; nothing is deprived of its warmth.”
In Isaiah 61:10, the prophet exclaims over the care the Lord has for him and for Israel. “For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.”
And in the next chapter, speaking about the redemption of God’s people, Israel, Isaiah says, “As a young man marries a young woman, so will your Builder marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you” (Isaiah 62:5).
Again, in Revelation, an angel reveals how the voice of bridegroom and bride will never be heard in Babylon again (Revelation 18:23). Then after the fall of Babylon, in the next chapter, we’re told how a great multitude cried out exclaiming how “the wedding of the Lamb has come, and his bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean, was given her to wear” (Revelation 19:7-8).
What about Bride or Bridegroom References in the Old Testament?
Numerous references appear in the Old Testament about the bride and bridegroom. For example, while the terms are not used, it appears God desperately wanted the first humans, Adam and Eve, to be his bride, but they betrayed him through disobedience. And over the years, humanity continued to go astray.
After the flood’s great reset, we’re told how God approached Abram (later renamed Abraham) and made a covenant with him, promising to give his descendants the land from Egypt to the Euphrates (Genesis 15:18) and later, when Abram was ninety-nine years old, promising to make him the father of many nations (Genesis 17:5). He reaffirmed this though Abraham’s grandson Jacob (renamed Israel) and his descendants forever (Genesis 28:13). Gd established a covenant with the people of Israel after they fled Egypt (Leviticus 20:26, Exodus 20:6, and Deuteronomy 26:18-19).
Of course, we know the people went astray and continued to do so. But God, the faithful bridegroom, kept giving them chance after chance for redemption.
As we’re told in Joel 2:13, “Rend your heart and not your garments. Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity.”
And in Hosea 14:4, “I will heal their waywardness and love them freely, for my anger has turned away from them.”
And in Zechariah 1:3, “Therefore tell the people: This is what the Lord Almighty says: ‘Return to me,’ declares the Lord Almighty, ‘and I will return to you,’ says the Lord Almighty.”
Yet we kept going astray.
Finally, God sent Jesus, “his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).
How Is Jesus Our Bridegroom?
First, Jesus paid the bride price, the mohar. He willingly gave his life on the cross to pay our sin debt.
Second, he claimed us as his own.
Now, for those of us who genuinely believe in him, repent of our sins, and have chosen to follow him, we have a place in heaven as Jesus’ bride. He will care for us and love us forever and ever. We belong to him, and he will look out for us and tend to our needs.
The bride and bridegroom are a fitting analogy about the beautiful, dedicated, loving relationship God has for us, his people. He’s given us chance after chance, and yet he still loves us.
We are incredibly, unbelievably blessed.
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/PeopleImages
