An Appeal to Parents for Biblical Discernment about Video Games

Video games have become integrated into the way many people spend their leisure time. What are parents to make of the way video games influence their children?

Disconnect from This Life

Through the years, video games have become increasingly immersive and realistic. Gamers are thrust into a vast world full of thrilling possibilities and complex dynamics which provide a sense of personal achievement. Games have features such as reward systems, adventure, discovery, economic systems, records of personal achievement, social networking, and recognition among fellow players. Because of these features, video games provide an artificial satisfaction for things people crave from the world.

Furthermore, many games have a number of options for the player to customize both their character in the game and the gameplay itself to their personal preferences. This makes it much easier for the player to identify with their character, and to project themselves into the game, so they have a sense that whatever happens to the character in the game also happens to them. This proves dangerous for the target audience of young adults and teenagers who are at a stage in life where they are trying to find their place in the real world.

Rather than helping people find their place in the world God created, video games help the players find their identity outside of it.

There’s an inevitable disconnect between real life and life in the gaming world. And when push comes to shove, many kids care more about what takes place in the gaming world than what happens in reality, even if they would never say it out loud.

Growing in the grace and knowledge of our God involves learning how He calls us to invest ourselves in the world He created, and not the realm of make-believe and fantasy. The more children invest time in video games, the more likely they are to become disconnected both from this world and from who they really are.

Danger of Influence: Nurturing Worldly Values

God takes the influences we allow into our lives seriously. Even though people are ultimately accountable for the choices they make, the influences in their life have a real impact. That is why the Apostle Paul reminded the Corinthians, “Do not be deceived, ‘Bad company corrupts good morals’” (1 Corinthians 15:33, NASB). All Christians would do well to remember this when it comes to video games, parents especially.

By nature, children are more impressionable than adults. Many games are played online where children have hours of interaction with other people within the gaming community. In most cases, gamers speak to each other either via typed messages in a chat box or via a microphone and headphones. Even though conversation will many times be limited to what is happening in the game, it is still consists of worldly chatter by worldly people.

Furthermore, there are gamers out there who enjoy saying brash, sacrilegious things about others because they delight in offending other people and being annoying. That’s one way they seek entertainment. This may not be unique to the gaming community because these things happen in the real world, too. However, unlike the real world, the gaming community provides unparalleled concealment. People like this because there are little to no repercussions for their actions. Due to this, such behavior tends to be amplified in the gaming community because people can speak any way they want from the safety of their home.

In fairness, there are certain online games and communities that have filters to ensure a certain level of “clean” conversation. Nevertheless, even in these communities there’s more than enough reason for any parent to think twice before allowing their child to expose themselves to such an environment. In most cases, even though certain words may be filtered, people can still communicate harsh insults, sexual innuendos, and other kinds of messages no Christian parent would want their child to be exposed to. Here are three other considerations for the kind of influence one finds within the gaming community:

Company of Foolish People

God tells us foolishness is bound in heart of child (Proverbs 22:15). That means children need parenting and the wise counsel of adults to grow and mature in their understanding of the world. This isn’t an insult to children; it’s simply the way God has ordained life to operate. It’s no secret the gaming community is primarily made up of young people. And by default, this means there is a lack of wisdom and greater presence of foolishness.

This is not to say there aren’t responsible, wise adults in the gaming community, however the atmosphere of gaming is not an environment where one learns how mature. Parents should consider what this means for their child and what kind of influence they are exposing themselves to, especially if they spend multiple hours a day in the online gaming community. Of course, it’s ok for kids to play and spend time with their peers, but it’s also important for them to have a high level of parental influence which helps them mature.

Environment of Anger and Rage

God warns us about spending a lot of time around angry people, “Do not associate with a man given to anger; or go with a hot-tempered man, or you will learn his ways and find a snare for yourself” (Proverbs 22:24-25, NASB). Anger is commonplace among gamers, especially because of the competitive nature of online gaming. In general, you don’t find many people who are gracious and humble when it comes to losing. It's not uncommon for people to express this via fits of verbal rage. How much do we want our children to be exposed to this environment?

Expectation of Pleasantries and Instant Gratification

In games, many times things happen fast.  No patience, real character, or perseverance is required. There’s no true personal sacrifice involved. If one is not careful, gaming can cultivate certain expectations for life that don’t line up with the reality of our fallen world — a fallen world that requires grit, hard work, patience and sacrifice. God takes our character and work life seriously and video games to not necessarily nurture a good work ethic if left unchecked (2 Thessalonians 3:6-12).

Pornography and Video Games

A sad reality is many video games are highly sexual on purpose. This does not always come in the form of explicit sexual content, but nevertheless, many video games target young men through their highly sexualized depiction of women. It’s naïve to believe a video game is sexually innocent if there is no explicit sex or nudity. Just because a game doesn’t have a “Mature” rating, does not mean it’s safe for a child to play.

The fact is God designed men to be attracted to the female figure. Even though a game may not contain nudity, many flaunt women as sex objects. Their voluptuous figures and scant clothing leave little to the imagination — indeed a form of pornography. Because of these features, in many games, women are naked without being naked. This enables companies to legally market their games to the broadest audience possible while exploiting the lustful desires of young men of all ages. Even if that isn’t the company’s intent, that is what happens.

All Christians, but parents especially, should take great care to see how the video games their children play depict women, because they may be inviting an unmonitored environment of sexual temptation into their child’s private life (Proverbs 7).

Getting a Handle on What Your Child Is Playing

The goal of this article is not to demonize the entire gaming community, or to make parents feel like failures if they allow their kids to play video games. The goal is to bring an awareness to the very real threats and temptations in the world of gaming so parents can respond appropriately (1 Peter 5:8). The dangers of video games go far beyond simply being timewasters. Limiting a child’s time on the screen isn’t enough. Parents need to be aware of the full scope of sinful and worldly influences within the realm of video games. Here are some suggestions on how parents can get a handle on the games their children play:

Investigate

Don’t rely on children to explain the content of the game they want. If they’ve played the game before, they will likely downplay anything in the game their parents may find questionable or omit mentioning it altogether. Furthermore, even if they earnestly try to describe the game as honestly as they can, without being deceitful, they still do not possess their parents’ level of wisdom and discernment.

The best thing is for parents to personally investigate the games their child wants before they purchase them. Even if a game has an “E” rating, there may be certain influences and ideologies within the game they don’t want their child exposed to. In the age of the internet, this is easy to do. Parents can find gameplay for almost any video game posted on places such as YouTube.

Play the Game with Your Child

Even if a parent doesn’t enjoy playing video games, it may still be a good way to bond with their children. Many games have multiplayer setting which allow for multiple people to play at the same time. If a child refuses to play a game while their parent is present, this may be a red flag. Darkness loves to hide from people who would hold any form of moral authority and accountability (John 3:19-21).

Take Some Time to Understand the Lingo

Just as with school, kids can learn some interesting phrases and acronyms which they integrate into their daily speech when they play games online. A lot of times these can be harmless and even silly. However, it’s still a good idea for parents to know what their child is talking about instead of passing it off as new generational lingo. After all, they may be saying something really inappropriate.

Consider How Realistic the Game Is

Parents should take into consideration how realistic a game is. Some games are more cartoonish and unrealistic, while others are breathtakingly realistic. Does the game distance itself from the real world, or does it seek to project the real world into the game? This doesn’t always matter much, but it’s worth considering if a game makes a child feel like they are experiencing real life through their game. This consideration becomes more important with subjects such as violence in video games. The objective of this article is not to make a stance regarding violence in video games, or to tell parents what their convictions should be on this issue. Nevertheless, parents still would do well to consider how to approach the subject with wisdom when dealing with the issue. 

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/MoMo Productions

Stephen Baker serves as the Associate Pastor at Faith Fellowship Church in Minerva, OH where he is discipled by pastor Chet Howes. He is currently a student at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. He is also the writer of a special Scripture study/reflection addendum to Someplace to Be Somebody, authored by his wife, Lisa Loraine Baker (End Game Press Spring 2022).