Could My Dreams Be a Sign From God?

EDITOR'S NOTE: He Said-She Said is a biweekly advice column for singles featuring a question from a Crosswalk.com reader with responses from a male and female point of view. If you've got a question about anything related to singleness or living the single life, please submit it to hesaid-shesaid@crosswalk.com  (selected questions will be posted anonymously).

QUESTION: I have had dreams of meeting and being married to a specific person of my acquaintance - but before we even met! I met him at a wedding last year, although I had no idea he would be there. One of my friends suggested to me several years ago that this guy might be a suitable alliance for me, so I have been praying about it since 2010. Could my dreams be prophetic - a sign from God? What does God's word say about revealing his will and guidance through dreams?

HE SAID:

Throughout the Bible, many of God’s people received guidance, instruction and direction through their dreams.

Joseph had many dreams in his youth which were a premonition of where God was going to take him (Genesis 37). He also received insight to interpret the dreams of others (Genesis 40).

Gideon received a message from God through the dream of one of his enemies (Judges 7).

Daniel was gifted with understanding visions and dreams for King Cyrus (Daniel 1).

God spoke through visions to guide and direct their path and the same could be true for you, and may have been disclosing who you would marry someday through your dreams.

Listen to my words: ‘When a prophet of the Lord is among you, I reveal myself to him in visions, I speak to him in dreams’ (Numbers 12:6).

I would be remiss if I didn’t encourage you to stay in prayer about the matter and caution you at the same time to keep your emotions in check until you are sure this is God speaking. Guys can get sort of freaked out knowing a girl they don’t really know had a dream about marrying them.

A number of my friends (male and female) are “public” figures and I have stood witness as they were approached by total strangers who expressed, “God told me we were going to get married” or “I had a dream we were supposed to be together.” Some went into some extravagant detail of what God had “showed” them. Trying not to be disrespectful to them, their response helped me to formulate my thoughts on this matter – “When God shows me, I will let you know.”

When God calls two people to be together, unified in His name, He will let both parties know. He won’t just tell one and leave the other in the dark.

What I have found to be true when I pray fervently for something, am troubled by some body or incident, or just have something at the forefront of my thoughts is I have dreams about it.

When he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will bring glory to me by taking from what is mine and making it known to you (John 16:13-14).

May the Sprit make known to you the truth of God and lead you to whom He has chosen in His time.

SHE SAID:

As a single woman myself, I have had a few encounters with men who I thought could be the "one." I have also, like yourself, have had dreams about them. But to dream of someone before you even met them is something I have not encountered. So let's try to tackle the questions you are asking and hopefully the answers can help you in making some decisions.

Could this guy be the "one," could your dream have been prophetic, and does God word reveal his will and guidance through dreams? First of all, yes, God does reveal his will and guidance (and sometimes even a mate) through dreams. In Matthew 1:20  an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, "Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.”

Besides here there are many other references to dreams. Why? Because God can reveal his will in any way that he wants. For some, dreams are a way God reaches us while others it's through circumstances, scripture, other people, etc. So the question is not if God can reveal your mate through your dream but how do you know for sure if that's what he's doing?

The only answer to this is to wait on God. I believe with all my heart that as women, we also need to wait on the man to pursue us. In the meantime, yes, continue to pray for this man, his growth in Christ, your growth in Christ and God's timing. Why would God reveal this man to you with such a long wait? Perhaps he knew he needed your prayers for him. Perhaps he knew you needed to grow in areas of patience and waiting on God. Either way, as you walk closer to God, listening and waiting for his guidance, you will know by the other truths God will reveal if this man is the one He has chosen for you. Be careful to not create your own destiny, but allow the Spirit to set up the next encounters with this man. It's way better, believe me.

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him (James 1:5, NKJV).

HE is … Cliff Young, a Crosswalk.com contributing writer and a veteran single of many decades. He has traveled the world in search of fresh experiences, serving opportunities, and the perfect woman (for him) and has found that his investments in God, career and youth ministry have paid off in priceless dividends.

SHE is … Kris Swiatocho, the President and Director of TheSinglesNetwork.org Ministries and FromHisHands.com Ministries. Kris has served in ministry in various capacities for the last 25 years. An accomplished trainer and mentor, Kris has a heart to reach and grow leaders so they will in turn reach and grow others. She is the author of three books: Singles and Relationships: A 31-Day Experiment (co-authored with Dick Purnell of Single Life Resources); From the Manger to the Cross: The Women in Jesus' Life; and the most recent, Jesus, Single Like Me with Study Questions (includes a leader's guide and conference/retreat of the same name).

DISCLAIMER: We are not trained psychologists or licensed professionals. We're just average folk who understand what it's like to live the solo life in the twenty-first century. We believe that the Bible is our go-to guide for answers to all of life's questions, and it's where we'll go for guidance when responding to your questions. Also, it's important to note that we write our answers separately (we think they sound eerily similar sometimes, too!). 

GOT A QUESTION? If you've got a question about anything related to singleness or living the single life, please submit it to hesaid-shesaid@crosswalk.com (selected questions will be posted anonymously). While we are unable to answer every inquiry, we do hope that this column will be an encouragement to you. Click here to visit the He Said-She Said archives.

Publication date: February 14, 2013