Home Sweet Home? - From His Heart - Week of July 28

One of the greatest football movies of the last twenty years has to be Remember the Titans.  Did you see it?  In one memorable scene, team captain Gerry Bertier is chastising fellow linebacker Julius Campbell for his poor attitude.  Campbell's response is classic, "Attitude reflect [sic] leadership, Captain."  Touché! 
 
The attitude of any family, team, company, church, office, or organization is a reflection of the leadership being provided.  As leadership guru John Maxwell said, "Everything rises and falls on leadership."  Leadership sets the tone and creates the culture.  With good and godly leadership, team members enjoy the benefits of honesty, integrity, serenity, and well-defined boundary markers of acceptable and unacceptable behavior.  With poor leadership, team members have to tiptoe through a minefield of dysfunction.  The whole attitude of the organization is poor when the leadership is poor ... because "attitude reflect leadership." 
 
YOUR MOST IMPORTANT TEAM
 
The most important team in any of our lives is team family.  When team family is led well, all the team members flourish in a safe and healthy environment.  When team family is led poorly, the team members languish in tension, conflict, hostility, drama, and the obvious absence of joy and peace. 
 
Years ago, I had a neighbor whose family was in perpetual turmoil.  Problems with a teenage daughter led to intense fighting and constant conflict.  The family's ten-year-old son played outside until dark most every night---just to escape the dysfunctional, oppressive atmosphere of the home.  It was heartbreaking to witness.  Tragically, that same scenario takes place in countless families in city after city.    
 
MEN MUST STEP UP      
 
God has given the responsibility of family to the father.  Certainly, his wife is a critical player, but the ultimate responsibility falls on dad's shoulders.  He is the head coach.  She is the assistant coach.  If team family takes on water, God holds the man chiefly responsible.  (Note: if the man is not in the picture due to death, divorce, or abandonment, leadership falls to the woman.)   
 
When Debbie and I got married, I took my role as head coach seriously.  I did not micromanage my wife or lead independently of her.  We worked together to set a home culture that honored the Lord.  When our girls came along, we made sure they grew up in a home where there was genuine love, laughter, peace, joy, and fun!  We disciplined them for disobedience, but we tried to always do it in love.  To be sure, we were not perfect parents.  We had struggles like everyone else, but we were committed to tackling problems God's way.  We did not throw sheets over elephants and sweep problems under the rug.  We dealt with issues using the Bible as our guide.  And you know what?  God blessed!
 
IS THERE ANYTHING YOU NEED TO CHANGE?
 
As you check the atmosphere and culture of your home, what do you find?  Is your home built on the rock of ages?  Is the joy of the Lord permeating the place?  Is your marriage solid and secure, providing a safe refuge for your children?  Is it fun to come home? 
 
If not, maybe you need to spend some time as family or as a couple discussing what is needed to turn things around.  Take the lead here, dad.  You are the head coach.  You set the tone.  Set it in the Lord's direction.  Be the example your family needs.  I promise, you will not be sorry!

P.S.  I would love to hear your thoughts on this.  Direct questions and comments to pastorjeff@fromhisheart.org.