You Are Part of a Mosaic
By: Lindsay Tedder
The words that came out of her mouth stung my heart. We sat together at my dining room table as she began to tear up. She admitted to me that she didn’t know her purpose in life or what she should be doing. I gave her a verbal hug and allowed her the space to continue opening up.
My reply to her life’s purpose pointed back to having a relationship with Christ and allowing Him to direct her steps. I knew she wasn’t super close to the Lord, but I thought she believed enough for this to make sense. As her tears grew larger and more frequent, she admitted that she really didn’t know if she believed. My heart ached at this realization, and I knew this was a time I had to surrender to His words and let Him use me.
I asked more questions than gave answers. I let her share all her doubts and thoughts. Then I congratulated her. Literally. I exclaimed that she was completely normal and that every single one of us has doubted this relationship at one point in our journey. I told her that if she wasn’t questioning, she wasn’t doing anything to discover her purpose and that was the most important step.
She had valid reasons for questioning if there was “really a God,” such as “why would He let this happen?” Or, “why did He let that person die?” I explained why I believe that God doesn’t let bad things happen to us but rather He holds our hands while humans abuse their free will. I explained to the best of my abilities while consistently praying through an internal dialogue that was perpetuating the mindset of “Jesus, take the wheel."
I knew how important this moment could be. I knew that I could easily have blown it and she could walk away more convinced than ever that there was, in fact, no God. I knew that it would destroy me if this person who I helped raise, who is more like family than most of my actual family, walked away thinking that this whole Jesus thing was a sham.
I silently continued to pray as I outwardly cried and admitted my own sins and shortcomings. I shared the Good News in the only way I know how. Together we laughed and cried. By the end of the conversation, she showed immense appreciation that I took the time to walk through all of that with her. We didn’t finish our time together with a “sinners prayer,” and I didn’t ask her to commit right then. I simply painted the picture as I see it.
Have you ever looked at a mosaic and wondered how in the world someone has the patience and vision to accomplish something so incredible? I know I have. I think that oftentimes we don’t give ourselves enough credit. Sometimes we are the mosaic tiles of God’s Word in the heart and life of another. We are the ones who take the tiny pieces of knowledge and help to build a beautiful image of His word. Sometimes, we are the only pieces that person will ever see.
No matter how small. No matter how seemingly insignificant. What you say and what you do will impact those around you. You may never realize the incredible mosaic image you are painting in someone else’s life.
I know most of us have heard: “Go therefore and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all things that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” Matthew 28:19-20 (NKJV)
When reflecting on my conversation with my friend who is more like family, I thought of this verse. In that moment, I didn’t feel much like I was making disciples of all the nations or baptizing them in the name of the Trinity. When my eyes wandered to the end of verse 20, “I am with you always, even to the end of the age,” I realized that I was seeking His words the whole time. He was with me in this conversation. I could have literally just repeated the word “poop” over and over and over again and she would have heard exactly what He needed her to hear in that moment, simply because I had asked to be used as His vessel. Now, we all know I didn’t do that, but my point is that I am not powerful enough to stop His words from reaching those who need them.
When I realize that I am not the artist, but rather the tile in the mosaic, my heart can be free to be exactly who I am because the power is not in my hands any longer. I do not control the image that is being created. He holds the power. He is in control. He paints the glorious mosaic; the incredibly intricate piece of art that is comprised of all the tiny bits and pieces that we willingly surrender to Him.
Lindsay Tedder is a believer, wife, mom, bestie and writer who lives in Columbus, Ohio with her bearded, bourbon-loving husband and her too-cool-for-school toddler. She is full of raw honesty, enthusiastic authenticity, amiable compassion, humble grit, powerful passion…and outrageous laughter, double chins, real life, and frothy nectar-of-the-gods coffee…because…coffee. Raised by a hardworking single mom, she overcame such trauma as sexual abuse induced food addiction, the debilitating health issues associated with endometriosis, a decade of infertility, and recurring life themes of worthlessness. Connect with her at www.LindsayTedder.com
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