I remember bringing my first baby home from the hospital. I could not understand how they could let an inexperienced 26-year-old oversee such a helpless little human. I mean, why did they think I was qualified? Fast forward 15 years. I am now a mother of four and have this parenting thing down. Or do I?
It’s daunting, to say the least, but the resources to help can sometimes be even more overwhelming. There are countless books lining the shelves and filling up our kindles. How to parent. How not to parent. How to raise successful, loving, compassionate, responsible, God-fearing adults. After all, isn’t the entire point to make sure that our children go out into the world fully equipped for the massive responsibility of adulting? That is an extensive job. One that some days I don’t feel like I am cut out for.
So, what is the best resource for parenting our children? Is it the beautiful covered, hardbound book sitting high on a perch as we walk into the bookstore, calling our name and shouting wisdom? Sometimes. Yes. The limited resources can be helpful and enlightening, but what is the most pure and timeless parenting guidance? The Bible, the true Word of God.
God is our father, and He created us to multiply and fill the earth. He inspired the Word of God to speak to us, guide us and give us the wisdom and truth for parenting that we so desperately need in this fallen world. The Bible speaks about parenting in very simple terms. Applying these to our family life will lay a solid foundation for all the difficult decisions that we will eventually have to make.
Here are Nine Simple Parenting Truths from the Bible:
1. Teach Your Child about God
Train up a child in the way he should go. Even when he is older, he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6
There is no guarantee that our children will choose to follow Christ, but we can rest assured that all the seeds we plant in their hearts about a God who loves them will not ever leave them. Pray that these seeds will grow and flourish, leading them to the way everlasting.
2. Children Are a Gift
“Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.” Psalm 127:3
When days get long and days get hard, let us remember that these little, or maybe not so little beings that rely on us so much are a gift. God chose us to be their parents and gave us the incredible responsibility of raising them up to love the Lord. Let us not forget what a beautiful privilege it is.
3. Children Are to Listen to Their Parents
My child, listen when your father corrects you. Don’t neglect your mother’s instruction. Proverbs 1:8
Children, obey your parents because you belong to the Lord, for this is the right thing to do. ‘Honor your father and mother.’ This is the first commandment with a promise: If you honor your father and mother, ‘Things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth. Ephesians 6:1-3
We are the ultimate guidance in our children’s lives. They are influenced by us more than anyone else. That gives us a tremendous responsibility. In turn, respect and obedience should be expected by our children. They will test our limits and put us to the test, but they need to understand that we are the authority in their lives. When we hold high standards for their obedience, it will give them a solid foundation for their future.
4. Don’t Hold Back on Discipline
He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him. Proverbs 13:24
Discipline your children, and they will give you peace of mind and will make your heart glad. Proverbs 29”17
Allowing our children to have free reign without learning the consequences of their actions can be detrimental to their development. Some may take “the rod” in a literal sense; however, I believe this passage is using that as a symbol for disciplining our children with a fitting punishment. Thus, teaching them obedience and that their actions lead to consequences, either good or bad.
5. Do Not Provoke Your Child to Anger
Fathers do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord. Ephesians 6:4
Fathers do not aggravate your children, or they will become discouraged. Colossians 3:21
When our anger gets the best of us, it may cause us to say things that we don’t mean, which can exacerbate any conflict with our children. We are to model patience and peace. Hostility or unkind words only hurt our children, no matter how much they anger us. We are the adults in any scenario, and it is our job to teach them how to handle conflict constructively and peacefully.
6. God Has a Plan for Your Children
Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born, I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations. Jeremiah 1:5
God appointed us as their parents long before we even knew they would exist. God created them with a specific purpose in mind. As a parent it is our privilege to help them seek and find their purpose in life. To support them and love them and inspire them to look to the Lord for their truth and guidance.
7. Always Talk about Jesus
These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Deuteronomy 6:6-7
The biggest responsibility that we have as parents is to teach them about the love of Jesus. To impress His truths on their heart. We are to talk about Jesus and his commandments all the time, revealing biblical truth to all that we do and relating it to all that we experience. Listening to uplifting and worshipful music and having Bible verses written in your home will give them a sense of security and the knowledge that God is everywhere, in everything, and cares about us, even down to the smallest detail. Building a solid foundation of truth in their lives will plant in their heart. When they are adults, they will remember all that you taught them, and hopefully, that will be their compass.
8. God Will Equip You for the Job
And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns. Philippians 1:6
Parenting is a relationship created by God. He knows what our children need, and He will give you the strength and guidance you need to parent your individual child. We don’t need to do it alone. Relying on our own strength and knowledge can be wearying, leaving us defeated and discouraged. Our children can be challenging, but we must remember that God understands all our difficulties and will be right there with us through it all.
9. PRAY for Your Child
This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. 1 John 5:14
The most powerful thing that we can do as parents is to pray. Pray for wisdom, guidance, and strength. He promises to equip us when we relinquish all our cares to him. Write these truths in your heart and display them in your home. Allow the children to see your dependence on the Lord, and the seeds will be planted.
Heidi Vegh is a writer, speaker, and ministry leader living in Western Washington. She is a remarried mother of four, navigating the blended family life after the loss of her first husband to cancer in 2013. She longs to use her writing as a way to encourage others who have experienced loss and guide them on the road to healing. She contributes to her blog found at www.mrsheidivegh.com , sharing stories and devotionals of faith stemming from her loss and healing, mothering, and her blended and complex family. She graduated from Southern New Hampshire University with a degree in Creative Writing and English and is working on her first book. Heidi is the Women’s Ministry Director at her local church and has a deep heart for sharing Jesus with women and encouraging them in their faith walk. When she is not writing, she loves to travel, read, craft, and experiment in the kitchen. Visit her Facebook and Instagram (@mrsheidivegh) to learn more.