A Prayer to Restore Healing to a Broken Friendship
By Alicia Searl
“My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command.” - John 15:12-14
I got a quiet knock on my door, only to open it and find a small bouquet of flowers and a card attached to them. My heart sank. Before I even read the card, I knew exactly who it was from. Questions flooded my heart. Do I respond? Do I open the card? Do I reach out and say, “Thank you?” This weight was so heavy, and the hurt was still so raw.
Honestly, just like this dear friend, I wanted things to go back to the way they once were, but we had reached a tipping point in our friendship and knew we needed to part ways. The sting of that friendship haunted me for a long time. I figured that healing would come with time, and thankfully, it did. However, in the meantime, I cried and prayed – a lot! I asked God for answers and many times felt as if He were silent, but the truth is He filled me with hope when I opened up His Word. He met me on those precious pages and covered me with verses about friendship. From what it means to be a good friend (Proverbs 18:24) and love at all times (Proverbs 17:7) to how friends can encourage and build each other up (1 Thessalonians 5:11, Proverbs 17:17, and Ecclesiastes 4:9-10). In the end I realized sweet friends ultimately draw us closer to God (Proverbs 27:9).
As I dug further into scriptures about friendships, I saw the warnings about bad company and influences in our lives (1 Corinthians 15:33) and read that dishonesty and anger cause division among friends (Proverbs 16:28). All of this got me thinking about how hurt and saddened Jesus must have felt when His very own disciple, Judas, betrayed Him. With a single kiss, Jesus was ratted out to the Roman soldier who led Him to His demise. Although Jesus knew this was going to happen, He still acknowledged the betrayal (John 13:21), remained calm (John 18:4), and showed compassion (Matthew 26:50). Is this the kind of friend we are called to be?
When a friendship is hurt, betrayed, or broken, are we to acknowledge it and then remain calm and show compassion? Yes, and yes! John 15:12-15 tells us to love others the way Jesus does, and based on how Jesus loved His disciples, including those that denied Him, doubted Him, and even betrayed Him, as believers, we are called to do the same. Impossible, right? Well, right. There is absolutely no way to love flawlessly like Jesus, at least not on our own. We are imperfect and very flawed beings, after all, but…we can lean into Jesus and seek His wisdom, discernment, and guidance when a friendship is broken and extending love is difficult.
If you are wrestling with a tattered and torn friendship today, take it to Jesus and ask him to grant you peace. Then, ask him to give you opportunities to extend his love back to others.
Let’s pray:
Faithful Father, thank you for giving us Your Word of Truth and extending Your love to us in return. We know that You created us in such a unique and special way, and with that comes the gift of community and connection. I am so grateful that You have given me sweet friends to do this life with. I pray that I am the kind of friend You are calling me to be. Help me to be compassionate, giving, kind, and sincere. Father, You also know that I carry a heavy burden with a friendship that is in need of Your healing hand. Trust has been broken, and pain has set in that has acquired deep wounds. It is so hard to even acknowledge the pain, much less remain calm and show compassion. Please help me. I need Your wisdom and guidance on how to approach this friend in love. Help me to seek Your direction on where to go from here. Please grant healing in this friendship, whether that looks like restorative peace to move on or an assurance to continue with safer boundaries put into place. Heal my heart and ease the hurt so that I can see and love this beautiful friend the way You do. I ask all this in Your precious Son’s name, Jesus, amen.
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Prostock-Studio
Alicia Searl is a devotional author, blogger, and speaker that is passionate about pouring out her heart and pointing ladies of all ages back to Jesus. She has an education background and master’s in literacy. Her favorite people call her Mom, which is why much of her time is spent cheering them on at a softball game or dance class. She is married to her heartthrob (a tall, spiky-haired blond) who can whip up a mean latte. She sips that goodness while writing her heart on a page while her puppy licks her feet. Visit her website at aliciasearl.com and connect with her on Instagram and Facebook.
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