A Prayer for Parents to Shepherd Their Children’s Hearts
By Jessica Van Roekel
"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23 NIV
When the nurses placed my firstborn in my arms, I wondered how I would raise her and what kind of person she would be. I had the “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” book dog-eared and “What to Expect the First Year” at the ready. These books had all the information I needed for the physical development of my little one, but they didn’t satisfy my questions about spiritual development. I’m a learner by nature, and I turned to the best book I had for advice—the Bible.
When we read the Bible through the lens of a Father’s heart toward his people, we discover how love does what is best for the ones we love. I quickly learned I didn’t have to teach my children how to hit or disobey; instead, I needed to teach them how to process their emotions in a healthy way and how to listen to their parents' wise words. The heart is what matters most.
In the Bible, the heart represents the center of our being and includes our intellect, will, and emotions. It is the source of our desires and decisions. Following our hearts sounds like good advice, but God’s Word reveals the naturally dark condition of our hearts apart from him. Be renewed is better advice and begins from within.
Proverbs 4:23 lays out a plan for the heart clearly when it says to “guard your heart above all else.” Does this mean we close our hearts or to stuff our emotions or let other people dictate what we do? No, to guard means to watch over or to guard the way. Proverbs 23:19 takes it a step further when it says, “Listen my son, be wise and set your heart on the right path.” We discover the heart needs to be kept for wisdom.
The things we allow our kids to see, hear, read, think, and speak are avenues for images and ideas to root themselves in their hearts and influence the type of people they become. Failure to guard our children’s hearts makes it difficult for them to “set their heart on the right path” as Proverbs 23:19 instructs. Keeping careful watch about what we as parents see, hear, say, and do adds strength and vitality to our spiritual lives, which gives us wisdom on what to allow into our kids’ hearts.
The second half of Proverbs 4:23 says, “For everything you do flows from it.” I’ve never heard a parent say, “I want my child to be rude and uncaring,” yet without purposeful steps to guard a child’s heart, we can create what we don’t want. When my children were quite young, I let them watch a few different kid’s shows, some that brought “life” from their hearts and others that didn’t. As they grew older, we had discussions about music, movies, and social media, which led to boundaries or “keeping watch” over their hearts through agreed-upon screen time limits. I discovered it was my responsibility to guard their heart until they could do so themselves.
Warren Wiersbe wrote, “If we pollute the wellspring, the infection will spread; before long, hidden appetites will become open sins and public shame.” The heart is the reservoir from which affections, desires, motives, and pursuits flow, and there is a great reward for the one who keeps their heart for wisdom. We, as parents, have the privilege to shepherd our children’s hearts so their hearts are kept for wisdom and the blessings that come from a life lived for God.
Let’s pray:
Holy God,
Thank you for making me a parent. The children you’ve placed within our home are gifts from you. Help me to steward the responsibility well. Forgive me where I’ve failed to guard my children’s hearts. Help me to shepherd them the way you shepherd me—with integrity, with kindness, with direction, with discipleship, and with sacrificial love. It’s hard to guard their hearts as well as my own. I need your help.
Give me diligence to stay the course. Give me your sound counsel to know what needs to stay and what needs to go for their best—not for my convenience. I don’t want to substitute religion or rituals in place of guarding their hearts. I want to be alert to what’s happening in them, which means I need to be alert to what’s happening in mine. Help me rethink my priorities if my spiritual hunger for more of you is decreasing. Fill me with renewed desire for you, your Word, and your ways so I can shepherd my kiddos' hearts.
I need your wisdom to guard what goes into my kids’ hearts so what comes out is pleasing to you and helpful for their spiritual growth. Let me guard them well so it’s easier for them to choose you and to walk in your path and purpose for their life.
In Jesus’ name, Amen
Photo credit: ©Getty/MoMo-Productions
Jessica Van Roekel loves the upside-down life of following Jesus as she journeys to wholeness through brokenness. As an author, speaker, and worship leader, she uses her gifts and experiences to share God’s transformative power to rescue, restore, and renew. She longs for you to know that rejection doesn’t have to define or determine your future when placed in God’s healing hands. Find out more reframingrejectionbook.
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