Caring for Your Wife When She Is Pregnant
By: Vivian Bricker
“In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body” (Ephesians 5:28-30).
“She will be moody, she will be mad at you for no reason, and her emotions will be a rollercoaster.” Husbands, if your friends have scared you with statements such as this, know that everyone’s pregnancy is different. Just because your friend’s wife had trouble in her pregnancy
and had a lot of issues does not mean your wife will have the same problems. While there are hormonal changes in pregnancy, your wife will not be radically different from how she is on a typical day.
Whether you have recently found out your wife is pregnant or she is in the thick of pregnancy right now, know that you can do many things to help her. Remember that she loves you, even if she has been having some mood swings. These mood swings will subside with time and don’t take it personally if she said something out of line. There is a lot going on with her right now, and she could be having her own anxieties about the pregnancy.
It would be beneficial for you to talk with your wife about your own worries concerning her pregnancy as well as any other conversations, such as when you bring the baby home. It is completely understandable if you are worried. You don’t have to white knuckle it out. Talk with your wife, express your concerns, and allow her to share any worries with you. Working together as a team can help you and your wife figure out any problem.
Bring these concerns to the Lord and leave them at His feet. Jesus will ensure everything goes smoothly in your wife’s pregnancy and delivery. Continue to pray with and for your wife on your own. Jesus delights to see husbands praying for their wives, and He will not turn a deaf ear to their prayers. Trust the Lord and know that He can do far greater things than you could ever imagine (Ephesians 3:20-21).
In addition to praying for your wife, you can help her in other ways. You are going to have to help her emotionally and physically. Some days she might be extremely tearful and filled with sorrow. Sit with her in these feelings and validate any feelings she is experiencing. On other days, she might be having extreme cravings. Even if the cravings are a bit weird, try to not make comments about them and get her what she is craving.
There is a common pattern that women crave pickles with ice-cream when they are pregnant, but your wife’s cravings might be different and it might not even be odd. Each time my mom was pregnant, she only ever craved mashed potatoes. Therefore, don’t buy any extremely weird food products until you know what your wife might be craving. And she might not even crave anything at all.
It is also important to mention that your wife might need some help when it comes to body image. This will be during and after her pregnancy. Most women undergo many changes when they are pregnant that continue after they have the baby. Weight gain is normal, healthy, and should be expected. It is essential that you don’t make any hurtful comments to your wife about her body, either during her pregnancy or after.
She is probably already insecure about her weight gain, and you don’t need to make it worse.
However, I trust that you love your wife and her weight is not a deciding factor of your life for her. Choose to help her through this time and remind her of how much you love her, how attracted you are to her, and how beautiful she is. Even if she never loses the weight she gained, don’t make any comments about how she needs to lose weight or how she looked better before she got pregnant.
This will lead to insecurities and self-hate for your wife. It could even lead her to developing an eating disorder. This is why you need to ensure you are careful, caring, and compassionate with your wife. The most damaging thing you could do is to hurt her at a time like this. Choose to instead love her as the Bible commands and to be a good husband to her.
The Apostle Paul tells us, “In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body” (Ephesians 5:28-30). By following Paul’s teachings here, you will love your wife correctly. Love your wife as you love and care for your own body.
Doing this will bring glory to God and happiness into your wife’s heart. Loving your wife shouldn’t be a chore. It should be a gift and a pleasure. Whenever you are in need of help in doing these things, turn to God, ask for His help, and ask Him to direct your steps. God will help you do the things you need to do for your wife.
“Dear God, my wife is pregnant, and it has given me many fears and anxieties. Please help everything to go well with her pregnancy and her delivery. Please also help me to do everything I can to care for her and show her my love. I don’t want to do anything that could hurt her. Thank you, God. Amen.”
Vivian Bricker loves Jesus, studying the Word of God, and helping others in their walk with Christ. She has earned a Bachelor of Arts and Master's degree in Christian Ministry with a deep academic emphasis in theology. Her favorite things to do are spending time with her family and friends, reading, and spending time outside. When she is not writing, she is embarking on other adventures.
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