Holidays are one of the most difficult times of the year when we’ve lost someone we love. Memories of having that special person beside us when we worship can make going to church painful, and even something we might feel like we want to avoid. But if possible, don’t withdraw. Worship is one of the ways that God will bring healing to our broken heart. Try finding a close friend or family member who will go with you.
Certainly, we’re in good company with the pain we’re feeling. Jesus’ friends and family must have felt decimated when he died. And Jesus is no stranger to grief. When His friend Lazarus passed away, He wept. While it’s important to grieve properly so that we can heal properly, there are also some things we can keep in mind that might bring us comfort with regard to the kind of life our loved one is enjoying in the presence of Jesus.
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1. Jesus Overcame Death, Hell, the Grave and Suffering
1. Jesus Overcame Death, Hell, the Grave and Suffering
While we presently live in a fallen world wrought with lots of misery, our loved one is living in a perfect place that the miseries of this life can’t touch. If our loved one was sick and passed away from some disease, or perhaps they were killed suddenly in some tragedy, they get to leave that sick or injured body behind. Their spirit is perfect, pain-free, and whole in the presence of the Lord. God didn’t create sickness, disease, suffering, and death. These are results of sin and the fallen world in which we live. When Jesus walked the earth, there were many people to whom He brought healing and wholeness, so when we pass from this life into the next, we can be assured that we’ll experience healing and wholeness in His presence in Heaven.
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2. Jesus Was a Man of Many Sorrows, Acquainted with Grief
2. Jesus Was a Man of Many Sorrows, Acquainted with Grief
Isaiah 53:3-5 tells us about how Jesus was despised and rejected, experienced pain and grief, and even what it’s like to be in turmoil and lack peace. Because He walked this earth, whatever we experience, He has experienced. So, we’re not alone in the pain that we feel when we lose a loved one. When we bring that to Him and let Him work through it in our prayer time, He’ll help us find peace and comfort.
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3. Jesus Reminds Us We’ll Eventually Be Reunited with Our Loved One
3. Jesus Reminds Us We’ll Eventually Be Reunited with Our Loved One
Though we miss them like crazy right now, the good-bye we’ve said to them isn’t permanent. The Bible talks about the Christian life being like a race (Heb. 12:1-2). We each run our own race, but at the same time, when life gets difficult, we can look at the lives of those who have gone on before us and all that God brought them through. Remembering them and what God brought them through helps us to find hope and inspiration for this life. The lives that inspire us can be those we know personally, and they can also be those whom we’ve read about and admired from the Bible. If we have a personal relationship with the Lord, we’re going to see our loved one again in Heaven, who has that, too.
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4. Jesus Is Preparing a Special Place for Us
4. Jesus Is Preparing a Special Place for Us
Most people connect this idea with John 14:1-3: “Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. 2 In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. 3 And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also.”
Many people talk about mansions (or some translations say rooms), but the idea is that once we’ve completed the work that He has for us to do in this life, our spirit is ushered into His presence if we have a personal relationship with Him. Of course, the same is true for our loved ones.
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Resources for Working through Grief
Resources for Working through Grief
The holidays can bring up the pain of losing a loved one all over again, whether it’s a recent loss or it’s been a few years. There’s no “right way” to grieve, and there’s no linear timeline for when we’re “done” grieving. When people talk about the “stages of grief,” we don’t typically go through them in a specific order. In fact, there’s a lot of jumping around, depending on what’s going on in a person’s life at a given time. Below are a few resources that can help people along in their grief journey and assist them with experiencing some healing.
GriefShare.org - This is a nationwide, Biblically based organization that is typically run through a church. It’s a small support group run by one or two facilitators who help people work through the loss of their loved one.
Healing Is a Choice - This book and workbook are designed to help people work through loss and find healing. Click here for a video sample of the material.
Focus on the Family has several good resources that deal with grief and loss.
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Originally published February 19, 2025.
