5 Signs You May Be the Christmas Grinch

1. You look at family as intruders.

Okay, so maybe they are, in a way. Family—extended family, for sure—can be a complete disruption in our lives. Perhaps they even bring along with them an entirely different type of baggage than the standard luggage. But barring major dysfunction, you know you're the Christmas Grinch if you eye a perfectly average family member with a scowl and a tight-lipped wince. It's one holiday out of the year, and yes, they may not be your favorite person (or people), but they are a part of your family tree.

This year, instead of grinching your way through family dinner, try praying your way to a servant's heart and ask how God can help you bring a smile to their life this Christmas.

2. You think Christmas is a waste of time.

You could be doing other things besides rubbing shoulders with relatives, putting puzzles together or playing games, eating fudge and caramel corn, and so on. That to-do list is just burning a hole in your pocket. What a waste of time it is, all this commotion and celebration over what? A green treen, a few boxes wrapped in paper, and Christmas carols that are so overplayed you're ready to listen to something else just to get away from it?

This year, remember that Christmas is about hope and reflection instead of bah-humbugging your way through the day. It is about the opportunity to slow down and take note of your blessings. That to-do list will be there tomorrow, the day after, and the day after. You are in this moment. Deep breaths before you turn green.

Photo credit: ©GettyImages/Aaron Amat

3. You don't like the food, you don't like the music, you don't like the noise.

Christmas can be chaotic. That's true. And stress is a real thing. So are bad menus, Aunt Lucy's fruitcake, and all the nieces and nephews screaming and raising a ruckus. In fact, you're tempted to take all the unopened presents and toss them out the window in hopes the kids follow, and you can lock the doors with them outside. Yes, yes. It's true. No one ever said Christmas was always "silent nights" and "all is calm." It's enough to take the most patient of saints and turn them into raging grinches.

This year, instead of going into Christmas with a tiptoe intent to steal all the fun, try joining in the fun. You don't have to holler with the kiddos or down Aunt Lucy's fruitcake—at least not all of it—but consider stretching yourself into trying something you're uncomfortable with. Then watch as the Christmas joy spreads into corners of your heart, and it begins to grow an extra size larger than it was before.

4. You completely forgot what Christmas is all about.

Sometimes, being the Grinch doesn't mean you're the holiday crank. Sometimes, it means you're the one busy scheming and concocting, planning and maneuvering, working and wiling your way through the season. The list of things to do and bake, people to see, and places to go is so long it rivals Santa's gift list. You've turned your Christmas season into a burden so large it's going to push your Grinch's sleigh right back down the hill and scatter all the possibility of joy, peace, and harmony into the snow banks. It might even run you over and leave skid marks on your sanity.

This year, instead of trying to heave a sleigh full of stolen Christmas cheer up your massive hill of things to do, leave that sleigh at the bottom of the drift where it belongs. Christmas isn't all about what must be done. Christmas is about what has been given and what you can give. It is a season of promise and hope because of what Christ brought us. Forgetting what Christmas is all about is a surefire way and a crash course in chaos and catastrophe.

5. You've decided that Christmas is all about who is not here.

Grief and loss are a real thing. So are the empty chairs at this year's table. The Grinch has been known to cry, and that is okay. But Grinches also dwell on the have-nots instead of shifting perspective to the have-blessings. Grief can turn into bitterness, which can turn into ugliness that steals Christmas from you and those around you. It is a fine line we walk between appropriate grief and obsessive wallowing.

This year, instead of focusing on what you don't have by way of those who have passed away, take time to unwrap the happy memories and smile and laugh at the joy that they have left behind. Remember, there is a time for mourning, and there is a time for laughter. Christmas without that special loved one will be touched by tears and wistfulness. That is, after all, a part of Christmas. Nostalgia and the remembering of what was. But wrap it in a smile and a touch of appropriate joy, and throw away the ripped parts of bitterness.

The Grinch has a way of making his way into our lives this time of year. Sometimes, it feels very right and appropriate to allow ourselves to shape-shift into a fuzzy green goblin. There are ways to justify every Grinch-like behavior or feeling; sometimes, life and its trials truly weigh us down and burden us. Perhaps a Grinch analogy meant to be humorous actually hurts because we wish it really was as simple as the familiar tale resolves.

Before we become the Christmas heel or a rotten banana, let's take a moment to step back. To pause. To reflect. To consider.

Isaiah 9:6: "For to us a child is born, to us a son is given; and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."

This. This alone is the star of hope shining bright that reflects off our Grinchliness of bitterness, irritation, exhaustion, exasperation, worry, fear, anxiety, grief, and you name the green-tinged emotion you're struggling with this season. That reflection is washed in the light of the hope of Jesus—the Christ-child. The One who came to bring salvation and hope and to wash away and make right all the sourness that touches our lives breaks our hearts and ruins Christmas.

And perhaps, "Maybe Christmas (he thought) doesn't come from a store. Maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more."