5 Things Not to Do with Your Transgender Neighbor

1. Demean them.

Instead: Promote their dignity

All our neighbors are people made in God’s image (Genesis 1:27). This is the foundation for human dignity—all individuals possess an inviolable worth, deserving of honor and respect. There are no exception clauses to this truth; there is no way for someone to be a human and not bear God’s image, even though they may obscure or mar it. Nothing anyone can do with their lives, or do to their lives, can eradicate the image of God.

To see the full dignity of a transgendered person means to abhor or reject any mocking humor that would demean them. It means to stand up and defend them against bullies or abuse. Dignity demands that we speak up in the defense of someone’s worth, even when we disagree with their way of life.

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2. Dismiss their experience.

Instead: Empathize with them

To love someone, we must seek to look at life from their perspective and walk in their shoes. Empathy is a prerequisite for building relationships and for speaking meaningfully into someone’s life.

So read testimonies of people who experience dysphoria. Make more effort, not less, to befriend someone in your neighborhood who lives out a gender identity different than their biological sex. Never dismiss someone out of hand because their struggles seem alien or strange to you, or because you disagree with the choices they have made or the identity they have assumed.

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3. Neglect to express truth.

Instead: Share God’s truth with them

The Bible’s definition of love runs contrary to the Western world’s definition. According to the world, loving someone means giving them license to pursue whatever they believe will bring them happiness or fulfillment. The Bible says that love requires truth, and that truth must be expressed with love (Ephesians 4:15).

So love does not mean looking someone in the eyes and affirming every desire they experience. Love means looking someone in the eyes and communicating the truth of Scripture. We are to do so gently, but we are to do so nonetheless. 

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4. Treat them with fear or scorn.

Instead: Show compassion to them

Many Christians have a tendency to feel alarm at new ideas, especially when those ideas deny rather than support biblical truths. But compassion means we must lay down any negativity we have toward those who think or feel or live in that way. Compassion says, “I love you, I will never look down on you, I am always here for you.”
     
After all, Jesus did not laugh at, mock or turn his nose up those who had rejected all his plans and desires for them. He treated them not with fear or scorn but with compassion.

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5. Try to make them change their mind.

Instead: Be patient with them

A believer who experiences gender dysphoria may never be freed of their gender dysphoria. Or maybe they will. The militant transgender activist who accuses those who disagree with pro-transgender ideology of bigotry or worse may never change their mind and place themselves under Christ’s loving lordship. Or maybe they will.

We have a patient God. All too often, God’s people act as if we believe that smugness, superiority, and angry moral pronouncements are what draws people to the gospel. In God’s economy, kindness, forbearance, and patience are his instruments (Romans 2:4).
    
No one is more patient than our God; and if he is patient, so must we be, too.

But don't stop there:

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God and the Transgender Debate - Free Download

For more information, check out Andrew T. Walker's book: God and The Transgender Debate:

This blog was an excerpt from God and The Transgender Debate, a book that helps Christians engage lovingly, thoughtfully, and faithfully with one of the greatest cultural discussions of our day.

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