5 Tips to Help You Talk to Your Kids about the Las Vegas Shooting
- Phillip Bethancourt Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission
- Updated Oct 03, 2017
How should you talk to your kids about the mass shooting in Las Vegas? There are five factors to consider when shaping how you talk with your children about a tragedy like this attack.
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1. Consider the Facts
Slide 1 of 5Because children may have limited access to reliable information sources, it’s commonly the case that they are uninformed or misinformed about difficult topics, especially when they unfold as breaking news. Children are also still developing the ability to effectively process complex information in limited time frames. You are not trying to prove yourself to be a police detective with all of the answers about what happened in Las Vegas. But you should seek to be a reliable source of insight for your children when tragic events occur.
The facts around the shooting in Las Vegas are constantly evolving as the investigation unfolds. It’s helpful to read articles from reliable sources that can enable you to familiarize yourself with the details surrounding the shooting and the ongoing investigation. Of course, the level of detail you use when talking with your children will depend on their age, the priority of the issue in your home, and your parenting approach. But we can’t assume that children understand the details. So, helping your child to consider the facts establishes an essential foundation for the rest of the conversation.
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2. Characterize the field
Slide 2 of 5If the first factor helps your children to understand what is going on, this one equips them to understand who is involved. In this case, that could include explaining the major players, such as the attacker as well as first responders and even the country music festival’s attendees. For those that can understand the more complex aspects of the situation, you can explain the role of the attacker’s motive and ideology when they become clearer as the investigation unfolds. Enabling our kids to understand who is involved helps to personalize the attack so that it doesn’t seem like an abstract tragedy that is disconnected from their experience in everyday life.
How should you talk to your kids about the mass shooting in Las Vegas?
In addition to equipping kids to understand who is involved, characterizing the field also includes explaining how they are acting. One of the long-term benefits of candid discussions with your children about difficult issues is that tragic events like Las Vegas often provide teachable moments because of the stark expressions of good and evil, courage and cowardice, love and hate. By providing insight into the character and behavior of the main actors in the situation, parents can better equip their children to display Christ-like character in their daily lives.Photo courtesy: Getty Images
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3. Confront the fears
Slide 3 of 5When children encounter significant tragedy, such as a mass shooting, it often induces anxiety. As a parent, you need to be the one who can anticipate and respond to the doubts and questions that arise in your child’s heart. It’s a natural part of fallen humanity for people to respond to senseless violence with fear and anxiety. That is no less true for our children (and, often, parents) when it comes to the aftermath of a tragedy like Las Vegas.
Parents must be willing to directly address the doubts and questions of their children. Will it be safe to go out in large crowds? Will a shooter attack people in our town? Will my cousin who is a police officer die if he encounters an active shooter? These are a small window into the fears that may pop up in our children’s tiny hearts. Parents have the unique opportunity to shepherd our children through their fears. When you respond to them in honest and age-appropriate ways, you can signal how we follow a God we can trust, even in life’s most difficult circumstances.
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4. Coordinate the flow
Slide 4 of 5One of the most important factors parents must consider when discussing difficult topics with their children is how to coordinate the flow of conversation and information our children receive. What should they learn? When should they hear it? How should they learn it? The key to coordinating the flow of information on a sensitive subject is to be intentional. Many parents find themselves reacting to a conversation that they are thrust into, rather than proactively anticipating the right opportunity to engage their children on the issue.
In the case of Las Vegas, coordinating the flow of conversation and information is critical. Surrounded by a 24-hour news cycle, social media, and a heightened apprehension by their peers, your children are going to be confronted by the latest developments in the tragedy. The question is: who is going to shepherd your children through it? Will it be the talking heads on TV, the chattering peers in their class, or will it be you? As parents, we can’t always pick the topics we need to engage our children on, but we can coordinate the flow of how we do it.
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5. Contend for the faith
Slide 5 of 5When difficult situations arise, it creates amazing opportunities for parents to reflect on the implications of the gospel for even the most horrific tragedies in our culture. Don’t miss the opportunity to help your kids learn how to apply the gospel to everyday life. You can help them learn more about how God is at work in the world when you faithfully equip them to process the difficult effects of living in a fallen world.
There are many insights children can gain through candid conversations about what happened in Las Vegas. As you explain the senseless violence and evil perpetuated by the attacker, you can enlighten them to how the Bible shapes our response to evil in a Romans 13 world. As you walk them through why a man is willing to take a bullet to protect his wife, you can show them how the Bible has much to say about loving others in a John 15:13 way. Perhaps most importantly, as you address hate of the attacker and engage the fears in their young hearts, you can equip your children to pray for peace in a Philippians 4:6-7 way.
Parents don’t get to pick the topics that occupy the news cycle. But you do get to shape the way your children think about them if you are intentional in your efforts. By integrating the five factors discussed above, parents can have gospel-shaped conversations with their children about the Las Vegas shooting and any other complex cultural issue.
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Adapted from the Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission article "How to talk to your kids about the Las Vegas shooting."
Used with permission.
Publication date: October 3, 2017