6 Ways to Show Love to Your Spouse Every Day

1. Communication

Being a good listener is critical. After a long day, your spouse may want to unload all their worries to move on from the day. You can show your love towards them by listening attentively. There is a difference between listening and being an active listener. Active listening requires concentration and purpose, but it shows you desire to hear what the other person is saying, and it builds trust.

Maybe as a mom you had rough day with your little ones. You need to share your day with your husband and finally have an adult conversation. Your husband may be in a rough season at work and need to discuss their current struggles. Share your highs and lows with each other.

Marriage is all about sharing in the journey. You are in this together. The more you can listen and understand where your spouse is coming from, the better you can provide the support they may need.

Communication can occur throughout the day if possible. Even if you aren’t in the same location, you could call your spouse on your drive, or have a quick chat at lunch time. Send a brief text to let them know you are thinking about them. Little touch points can do a lot to keep you connected.

2. Physical Affection

Whether your spouse travels and you only see them on the weekends, or if you both work from home, physical affection goes a long way to keep you connected and show love.

Hugging and kissing have many benefits. Research shows that they reduce stress, can lower blood pressure, and help with relaxation. They can also boost the release of oxytocin, the hormone associated with bonding and feelings of trust and affection.

There are loads of people out there struggling with anxiety and depression, and here are free, effective ways you can help your spouse handle stress. God designed us to be able to gain all these benefits from a simple act that also keeps us connected with our spouse.

I understand you and your spouse are busy, you are stretched thin, and you don’t have time for one more thing. However, this one act of affection towards each other can help you manage all the other stresses.

Of course, intimacy is extremely important in a marriage. It’s one of the special gifts God gave to married couples. Make sure you enjoy the gift. Being intimate is yet another way to help reduce stress. Men may not voice this, but they need love and affection, too; it motivates them.

Don’t forget about your spouse, they need affection, and so do you. Showing affection towards each other is an easy, cheap way to stay united. On a daily level, hugs and kisses are a big bang for your buck.

3. Compliment Don’t Criticize

When going about your day, it’s easy to notice and comment on the things our spouse did that we might do differently. God made us all different. We look distinct, think uniquely, and part of our Christian journey is recognizing the blessing of this in others. Everyone doesn’t have to do things the way we do.

What if, every day, you showed love to your spouse by complimenting them on something? Point out their outfit, appreciate the delicious meal they cooked, thank them for cutting the grass, or how they played a game with your child. Acknowledge them for working hard or fixing things around the house. Thank them for loving you. There are loads of opportunities to show gratitude and encourage our spouse, we just need to be looking.

Everyone has struggles. This world is filled with battles, especially as a Christian. We want to be supportive and encouraging inside our homes. Especially to our spouses. They are not perfect, and neither are you. As a recovering perfectionist, I get it can be hard when we expect things a certain way. However, our words matter and can lift the spirits of our spouse when used properly in love.

Proverbs 12:25 tells us, “Anxiety weighs down the heart, but a kind word cheers it up.”

Let’s point out the positive things our spouse does. Let’s compliment them so they know we appreciate them. Let’s build them up!

“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Ephesians 4:29)

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4. The Little Things Matter

Loving your spouse isn’t always about the grand gestures. It’s not about that amazing trip you took on your anniversary or the jewelry you bought your wife. It’s how you treat each other in the day to day that matters. While those grand trips and presents are wonderful, and they have their place, they aren’t something you can sustain on a daily level.

Women want to be loved and men want to be respected. When these two things are occurring daily, it will make for a loving environment.

Be aware of your spouse’s morning routine and do something that supports them. This shows them they matter, that you care about them, and are putting their needs above your own.

For example, I make tea in the morning. I leave the hot water on for my husband because he uses it after me. I help him load up his car in the morning. He takes our daughters to school and then heads to work. He usually has beverages, a briefcase, a workout bag, etc. He is loaded down with all the things he needs for the day. I take a few minutes to help him load up those items so he can get out of the house on time.

The minor things make big differences. What is something little you could do for your spouse each day?

5. Knowing Your Spouse

To show love to your spouse, you must learn how they prefer to receive love. Otherwise, you might spend a lot of time doing things for them that they don’t appreciate. Gary Chapman covers this well in his book, The Five Love Languages.

Know your spouse’s love language so your efforts will hit home. If you are an acts of service person, and your spouse keeps bringing home gifts for you thinking they are doing a great thing, their efforts might be in vain because that’s not how you feel loved. You would much rather them take out of the trash.

There are five love languages: physical touch, acts of service, gifts, quality time, and words of affirmation. We tend to show love in the way we like to receive it; however, most likely, you and your spouse do not have the same love language.

Pay attention to how your spouse shows you affection; that’s most likely how they would like to receive love.

Don’t think that because you have been married for ten years, you have your spouse all figured out. We all change over time, be aware of your spouse’s new interests, habits, or challenges. If you aren’t sure, ask them. They will appreciate that you are curious and paying attention to what is going on in their life.

Related: Strengthening Your Marriage with the 5 Love Languages: The Ultimate Guide

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6. Say "I Love You"

Tell your spouse you love them. This might seem simple, but sometimes we forget to tell the person closest to us that we love them. You could get into the habit of saying this when you get off the phone with your spouse or say goodbye to them in the morning.

Saying I love you is a wonderful way to remind your spouse how special they are to you. We never know when our last day will be on this earth. We want to ensure that they know how we feel about them when we depart from this world.

A verbal “I love you” is great, but you could also send a text throughout the day or write them a quick email. Maybe pen a little note and leave it on their pillow or on occasion mail them a card to work.

Don’t assume your spouse knows you love them. You want confidence and connection in your relationship, not doubt. I don’t believe these words get worn out over the years; I imagine they age like fine wine. If saying this phrase has faded like the sunset, bring it back. It’s never too late.

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” (1 Corinthians 13:13)

Marriage is a blessing. Thankfully, we have someone to share this crazy life with. Let’s show them we appreciate them.

Showing our love to our spouse every day is an impactful way to keep our relationship strong. When our Christian marriages are thriving, they provide a wonderful environment for kids to be raised and grow up to know the Lord. Let’s do what we can to thwart Satan’s negative efforts and put our focus on loving our spouse well.