7 Loving Ways the Church Can Minister to Singles

1. Affirm Them in Their Singleness

Words of affirmation come in many forms. They are heartfelt expressions given to others to uplift and encourage them in many aspects of their lives. They can be read in a book, handwritten on a card, or simply expressed verbally. When it comes to single believers, many people often affirm them in their potential to be a spouse. While nothing is wrong with this, these gestures make it seem like marriage is the only way a person can have a fulfilling life. Affirming singles for who they are and not their relationship status will help them grow as the individuals God created them to be. To effectively affirm your single brothers and sisters in Christ, take some time to do the following:

-Tell them you love them with the love of God

-Tell them you believe in them.

-Give them cards of encouragement.

-Gift them with a book of daily affirmations.

-Let them know that their singleness is a season filled with blessings designed specifically for them during this time in their life.

-Encourage their walk in discipleship.

-Let them know that they are complete in their singleness.

No matter how you decide to affirm singles, make sure the focus is on who they are as a person, not their relationship status.

2. Support Singles Ministry Work

Supporting singles in their journey through discipleship means supporting them through ministry work. While we are members of the body of Christ and one in Him, there are individual needs that must be met to ensure every believer is supported properly through ministry work. Supporting singles in ministry work means that there are specific things tailored to the needs of single believers. There are so many ways churches can support the ministry work of singles. For starters, singles should have a prayer line to uplift their heartfelt concerns about singleness for unmarried believers. The church can sponsor singles ministry retreats focusing on various topics specific to their needs. The church can also create Sunday school and Bible study classes specifically for singles. To take things a step further, churches and their leaders can create a specific curriculum for these classes so singles can be ministered to effectively. If singles in your congregation are hosting an event, every congregation member should try to support them. They can distribute literature to promote it, or they can attend and provide support where it is needed. Ministry work is vital to the church's growth and must be supported with the love of God.

3. Discover What Singles Need from the Church

When it comes to meeting the needs of singles, churches often miss the mark. They miss the mark because they presume that every single Christian desires marriage, and they don't take the time to discover what singles need beyond this narrow-gauged scope. The heart of ministry work is learning about and meeting the needs of others. In an effort to minister to singles in love, churches must first understand what singles need. Churches can create a series of diagnostic questions to assess various needs in areas of their lives beyond their relationship status. The diagnostic can be anonymous, and responses can be used to design ministry activities specifically for the needs of singles. Once the needs have been assessed, it's time to move forward with taking action towards putting things in place.

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4. Avoid Matchmaking

There have been ongoing misconceptions about singles and their desire for dating and marriage. People are led to believe that every single person desires marriage. They also perpetuate the narrative that if someone is single, they should be actively dating with the goal of marriage in mind. While these are common desires for many singles, believe it or not, all singles do not desire marriage, and many do not constantly date in search of a lifelong mate. That said, as you minister to singles, avoid matchmaking as much as possible for several reasons.

a) You may not know what your brother or sister in Christ desires or requires in a mate.

b) You cannot assume someone will be a good mate for someone else based on what you know about them outside of being in a relationship.

c) If things don't work out between the recommended matches, you may possibly damage your personal relationships.

d) If not done with the right spirit, the people you are trying to match may take offense to your efforts.

While matchmaking is a kind gesture, it's also one that must be done with pure intentions to introduce someone to someone else that you know is seeking companionship. If you want to match one single with another, be sure they are ready and willing to be introduced to someone else. If not, then avoid matchmaking within the church at all costs.

5. Learn to Pray for the Wholeness of Singles

Prayer is communication with God. It is the time when we submit our cares to Him. It is the time when God speaks to our hearts. It is the time when we confess our sins and express gratitude for who He is and what He's done. When it comes to prayer, believers know and understand that they can go to God in prayer for anything they need. When it comes to singles, many people believe that it is best to pray for marriage for singles. While there is nothing wrong with this, it's important for people to understand that simply praying for a mate for an unmarried believer is not enough. When ministering through prayer for singles, prayers should be centered around the wholeness of the single person. Whether we want to believe it or not, singles grapple with issues beyond living without a mate. If it is your desire to minister to singles through prayer, learn to pray for their wholeness during this time in their lives. 

Pray and ask God to regulate their minds, hearts, and spirits so that they may live a life that is pleasing unto Him. Pray that they can regulate their sexual desires and not indulge in fornication. Pray for prosperity and joy within their careers. Pray that they understand the fullness of God's love for them. If you love the singles in your life, pray for the fullness of theirs.

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6. Minister to Singles about the Fullness of Life in Their Season

The single life is multifaceted and serves a distinct purpose. It is the time for singles to build a profound relationship with God. It is the time when singles develop an understanding of themselves. It's a time to discover spiritual gifts and so much more. Many singles often miss out on the fullness this season of life has to offer simply because they've been taught to primarily focus on marriage while single. If you desire to lovingly minister to the singles in your life, take some time to teach them about everything this season has to offer.

7. Be Mindful of the Questions You Ask

Singles are often bombarded with questions about their relationship status, inside and outside of the church. While it's fine to inquire about someone's love life, it's best to be mindful of the types of questions you ask. You don't want to be overbearing, offensive, or disrespectful with your questions because you don't know how the questions may be perceived. When asking singles questions, ask general questions about their well-being. Even if you have a personal relationship with them, you want to be mindful of how you inquire about their singleness.

The church is the place where believers from every walk of life gather to worship, work, grow, and fellowship with each other. When we minister to others, we are representing Christ. Christ is love. When we minister to each other, we should always do it with the love of Christ. Ministering to singles is a blessing and a privilege that should not be rooted in relationship talk. It should uplift their entire existence as members of the Body of Christ.