Being married isn’t easy. It’s not simple. Sometimes it’s not even fun. That’s why romance and happy times aside, it is crucial to strengthen our marriage. It’s critical to focus on that daily. The word “strengthen” is used many times throughout Scripture and regarding many circumstances such as war and battle, bolstering one’s spirit against sorry, preparing for working the earth, and so on. The source of the strength provided in Scripture is inevitably from the Lord.
It’s not rocket science to comprehend that anything weak will not withstand trial, trauma, tragedy, and the daily grinding away at our foundations. Sometimes, our marriage foundations can be weakening without us even realizing it. Frenetic paces of life, financial stressors, work expectations, children’s schedules, and the inevitable differences of opinions can erode and decay a foundation. Then, at a moment’s notice, the foundation collapses into itself, and we are left with the ruins of a marriage.
Strengthening our marriage means making concerted efforts to do so, just as we must strengthen our bodies, health, and other relationships around us.
So, what are some Biblically sound and even encouraged things we can do to strengthen our marriages?
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1. Recognize Together Where Strength Comes From
1. Recognize Together Where Strength Comes From
Our strength comes from the Lord. But human nature also instinctively attempts to gain strength in and of itself. This submissive humility in recognizing the source of our strength is critical, and both spouses must acknowledge this truth.
Create a daily practice of revisiting this verse as a couple as a reminder. You can also post this Scripture in your bathroom, kitchen, or somewhere you can revisit it often.
Isaiah 41:10: “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” ESV
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2. Maintain Unity as a Couple
2. Maintain Unity as a Couple
This isn’t easy. Unity can be one of the hardest things to maintain. It’s also undeniable that without unity, one lacks strength. But how does a couple maintain unity? Ephesians 4 gives us a really solid look into the process:
“I, therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” (4:1-3 ESV)
The passage ends with the call to “maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace,” so it’s essential to read the “how” that comes prior to it. With “humility and gentleness,” “with patience,” and “bearing with one another in love.”
Those are fundamental standards for achieving unity; when unified, there is great strength.
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3. Show One Another Love and Respect
3. Show One Another Love and Respect
We often get hung up on Scripture's call to wives to submit to their husbands. But let’s look in context and not miss a critical piece of the Word that will help strengthen our marriage.
Ephesians 5:33 says, “However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”(ESV)
Once again, we need to break down this Scripture. Husbands are to “love his wife as himself.” It is uncontested that our nature is to love ourselves more than anything. We will sacrifice so much on behalf of our personal comfort, success, worth, and even life. Husbands are called to do so for their wives. In other words, husbands, your wife’s value should be equal to if not more than you value yourself. And wives? We are called to respect our husbands. Respect is a huge part of strengthening our marriage, but in our culture, so much is thrown at us to undermine and emasculate our husbands. To point out their failures, to question their opinions, and even their intelligence. But no, we are called to respect them.
And oh, how much easier is it for him to love you as himself when he feels valued and respected, and oh, how much easier it is for you to respect him when he sacrifices himself on your behalf?
A marriage can be strengthened by engaging in humility, recognizing that our strength comes from God alone, striving to be unified as a couple, and practicing love and respect. None of these elements are easy, but the concepts can be simple. When practiced, they can create firm marital foundations.
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Originally published March 21, 2025.
