7 Essential Strategies for Balancing Motherhood and Marriage

1. Prioritize your relationship with God.

The foundation of a balanced life is a strong relationship with God. By seeking God first, you can find the strength and wisdom you need to fulfill your roles as a mother and wife well. Jesus promises in Matthew 6:33 that God will give you whatever you need if you’re seeking a closer relationship with him: “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

Setting aside daily time for prayer and meditation, as well as reading the Bible, can help you stay connected to God each day – no matter how busy you are. A practical way to incorporate this into your busy schedule is to start your day with a devotional or a quiet moment of prayer. Even if you do so only for a few minutes, dedicating this time to focus on God in the morning can set a positive tone for the rest of the day.

As you develop a habit of intentionally connecting with God, you’ll start to notice God’s presence with you more and more. That will center your mind and bring peace to your heart. It will also inspire you to keep prioritizing your relationship with God, because you’ll feel his love for you and enjoy the time you spend with him. Every week, also prioritize worshiping God in church. Connecting with God in the context of a church community can give you a strong spiritual support system and help you grow spiritually.

Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/Sinenkiy 

2. Pray together and for each other.

Prayer is a powerful tool that can strengthen your marriage and help you navigate the challenges of motherhood. Praying together fosters spiritual unity and encourages you all to rely on God together. In Colossians 4:2, the Bible urges: “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.” Develop a habit of praying with your spouse daily. This could be a short prayer in the morning, before bed, or any time that works for both of you. Praying together helps you align your hearts and minds with God's will and strengthens your partnership. In addition to praying with your spouse, pray for him. Lift up his needs, dreams, and struggles to God. This act of intercession not only brings you closer to God but also deepens your empathy and love for your spouse.

Pray with your children as well, teaching them to communicate with God alongside you and also encouraging them to pray on their own regularly. Ask them to let you know anytime they would like you to pray with or for them about any situation that arises in their lives. Establish a family prayer time, where everyone gathers to pray and share their prayer requests. This could become a part of your family dinners together, or it could take place at another regular time in your family’s routine, such as at bedtime. This can help teach your children the importance of prayer and demonstrates how faith can be an integral part of daily life. Pray over your home regularly, as well. Through prayer, you invite God’s love to flow into your lives together and to make your home a loving environment. 

Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/dragana991 

3. Make time to pursue wonder together.

In the middle of your busy life, it’s vital to prioritize awe-inspiring adventures with both your spouse and children. Feeling awe changes your perspective, so you can see beyond your circumstances to God, who is there to help you in any circumstances. So, make time to pursue God’s wonder together regularly, by including inspirational adventures in your schedule as often as possible. There is always something wonderous to discover, if you intentionally look for it.

Job 5:9 says of God: “He performs wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted.” Get out in God’s creation by enjoying nature together and marveling at God’s handiwork. Plan a date with your spouse to eat dinner outside and then enjoy stargazing. Plan a family nature hike where you can help you children discover how different parts of nature reflect different parts of God’s character. Visit parks near you and take trips to parks in other areas so you all can enjoy diverse natural environments: mountains, forests, beaches, deserts, and more. Beyond nature outings, plan other inspiring adventures together that engage your senses and lead you to wonder. Enjoy music concerts together and praise God together for music and creativity. Eat out at restaurants that feature different kinds of ethnic cuisines to try together, and discuss how God is at work around the world in every nation.

Another way to pursue God’s wonder is through acts of service. Volunteer together as a family at church or in your community. Working together to help people in need not only strengthens your marriage and family bond but also teaches your children the value of compassion and generosity. Finally, participate in church worship services together. Engaging in worship will help each of you grow spiritually and deepen your faith collectively.

Photo Credit: © Getty Images/jacoblund 

4. Communicate openly and regularly with your spouse.

Clear, honest, and regular communication with your spouse is essential to keep your life balanced as both a wife and a mom. Discuss your needs, expectations, and concerns regularly. These conversations can help you understand each other’s perspectives and find common ground. Create a habit of having regular check-ins with your spouse. This could be a weekly time where you set distractions aside and sit down together to focus on you both discussing your week, your feelings, and any issues that may have arisen. It’s also important to express appreciation for each other, the efforts and contributions each of you makes. When conflicts do arise, approach them with a spirit of patience and understanding. Instead of reacting in anger, take a moment to pray for God to guide you to wisdom. By doing so, you model effective communication and problem-solving skills for your children. Focus on listening to each other carefully, with love and respect.

James 1:19-20 points out: “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.” Also, consider learning about each other’s love languages. Understanding how your spouse feels most loved and appreciated can significantly strengthen your communication and your marriage overall. Tailoring your expressions of love to meet each other’s needs can give you both the support you need to balance your roles well.

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Prostock-Studio 

5. Set healthy boundaries.

Establishing boundaries helps prevent burnout and ensures that you can give quality time to both your children and your marriage. Setting healthy boundaries is an important way of guarding your heart, as Proverbs 4:23 urges you to do: “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” This might mean saying “no” to extra commitments that can bring unnecessary stress into your life. It might involve setting and protecting specific times for family and couple activities. You can also designate certain hours for family time to focus, without distractions from work or electronic devices. For example, establishing a no-phone policy during dinner can help everyone focus on meaningful conversations.

It’s also essential to protect your couple time. Consider setting aside one night a week for a date night, even if it’s just a quiet evening at home after your children are in bed. In addition, teaching your children about boundaries helps them understand the importance of personal time and respect for other people’s time and space. This can lead to a more harmonious household, where everyone’s needs are considered and valued. Boundaries also apply to self-care. Recognize when you need a break and take time to rest and rejuvenate. This might involve setting aside time for hobbies, exercise, or simply relaxing with a good book. By taking care of yourself, you can help make sure that you have the energy and patience to care for your family and marriage well. 

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Prostock-Studio 

6. Embrace teamwork.

Approach parenting as a team effort with your spouse. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 points out: “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up…”. Share responsibilities and support each other in the hard work of the parenting journey. This teamwork not only lightens the load for both of you, but also builds a strong family foundation.

Dividing household chores and parenting duties helps make sure that neither partner feels overwhelmed. Discuss each other’s strengths and preferences, and assign tasks accordingly. For example, if one of you enjoys cooking while the other prefers helping with homework, you can divide these responsibilities to play to your strengths. Also, involve your children in age-appropriate chores. This not only teaches them responsibility but also fosters a sense of teamwork within the family. Celebrate small victories together and acknowledge each person’s contributions, reinforcing the idea that you are all working toward common goals.

Teamwork in parenting also means supporting each other emotionally. Be there for your spouse during stressful times and offer encouragement and affirmation. Attend parenting classes or workshops together to enhance your skills and knowledge. By working as a team, you create a unified front that provides stability and security for your children, demonstrating the power of partnership and cooperation.

Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/jacoblund 

7. Offer grace and forgiveness.

No one is perfect, and mistakes will happen in both motherhood and marriage. Offering grace and forgiveness to yourself, your spouse, and your children helps you build a loving and supportive home environment. Ephesians 4:32 encourages you: “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” When conflicts arise, approach them with a spirit of forgiveness and understanding. Remember that everyone has flaws and that holding onto grudges only harms relationships. Practice forgiveness as Christ forgave you, showing love and compassion even in difficult times. Extend this grace to yourself, as well.

Balancing motherhood and marriage can be challenging, and it’s important to remind yourself that you are doing your best. Avoid self-criticism and instead focus on the positive steps you are taking. Teach your children the importance of forgiveness by modeling it in your own actions and encouraging them to resolve conflicts with kindness. Create a home environment where mistakes are seen as opportunities for growth rather than failures. Encourage open communication about feelings and mistakes, developing an atmosphere of trust and support. By consistently offering grace and forgiveness, you build a family culture that mirrors God's unconditional love and mercy. That will make your home a haven of peace and acceptance. 

In conclusion, balancing your important roles of motherhood and marriage can be challenging, but with God’s guidance, it is possible to thrive in both areas. By prioritizing your relationship with God, communicating openly, setting boundaries, making time for each other, praying together, embracing teamwork, and offering grace and forgiveness, you can create a harmonious and loving family life. Remember, you are not alone in this journey. Rely on God’s wisdom and strength, and God will guide you every step of the way. Through God’s grace, you can balance both motherhood and marriage well, and find joy as you do so.

Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/AaronAmat