6 Prayers of Comfort to Help Those Grieving during the Christmas Season

6 Prayers of Comfort to Help Those Grieving during the Christmas Season

I remember clearly the first Christmas I faced without my mother. It was Christmas of 2016. She had passed a little over two months ago, and the grief was overwhelming. My emotions were all over the place—some days, I would break down in tears, and other days, I would lash out in anger. Grief is something that changes us, but we don’t need to try to get rid of it. It is truly something that reflects the love we have for the person who passed away.

Many people told me that time would help me heal. As nice as that would be, it simply is not true. Healing from the death of a loved one will not happen overnight. The idea of completely being healed from grief is not reasonable. Out of the love you have for your loved one, grief might continue to walk beside you for the rest of your life.

Grief has become my friend, and I no longer try to make it go away. I see grief as a reminder of the love I have for my mom. And in truth, I would never want to make that go away or to “heal” from the love I have for her. Christmases won’t ever be the same without her, but it doesn’t mean Christmas cannot be a joyous occasion for those of us who are going through grief. 

If you have recently lost a loved one or it has been many years since they passed away, know that your pain is valid. Here are six prayers of comfort to help you as you walk through this Christmas season with a heart of grief.

Photo Credit: © Getty Images/tommaso79 

  • Praying at Christmas

    1. A Prayer for Acceptance

    Without accepting grief, we won’t be able to fully process what has happened. Encountering the death of a loved one is terrible and has the ability to completely destroy us. However, God doesn’t want us to be destroyed by our pain. He wants us to turn to Him, focus on Him, and rest in His goodness. Jesus tells us, “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled, and do not be afraid” (John 14:27).

    Jesus never wanted us to endure the death of our loved ones. He wanted us to have peace and eternal happiness. Once the fall of mankind happened, all of this changed, and death came into the world. Although death is a reality for all of us, we have the opportunity to inherit eternal life by placing faith in Jesus (John 3:16-17). Through Jesus’ death on the cross, we can accept grief because we know we will see our loved ones again in Heaven. 

    “Dear Jesus, please help me to accept grief. I have been trying to fight it for so long. I was hoping it would have been gone by Christmas. Please help me to accept this new aspect of my life and bless my heart so that I am able to rejoice on Christmas. I thank You, and I praise You, Lord. Amen.”

    Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Xesai 

  • Sad and single at Christmas

    2. A Prayer for Brighter Days

    It might not feel like it right now, but brighter days are ahead. Christmas might actually bring a few smiles or laughs into your life even though you are facing grief. There is a misconception that just because someone is grieving, it means they will never smile or laugh. This is not true, as there can still be many happy moments while walking through seasons of grief. It is a disservice for people to think this way because it paints the idea that if someone is smiling, then they are not going through anything. 

    Whether you are the person going through grief this Christmas or a loved one is, choose to be present with yourself or with the person. If you are a person going through grief, don’t feel bad for smiling or enjoying your Christmas celebration. Smiling and having fun doesn’t mean you have forgotten your loved one. In truth, your loved one wants you to smile and have fun again. 

    If a loved one is the person who is going through grief this Christmas, be a source of support for them. Don’t assume they are doing okay just because they smile at the Christmas party. Truly be there for them and help them as best as you can. If they don’t want to talk about the grief, don’t push them, and if they do want to talk about it, be a safe place for them to share their feelings with you. Validate their feelings and genuinely show concern for them.

    “Dear God, I am coming before You today, asking for brighter days. Right now, it feels like only darkness is before me. Please help brighter days to come and for me to smile on Christmas. I also ask You to help anyone else who is going through grief, as I know how hard it can be. Thank You, Amen.”

    Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Drazen Zigic 

  • sad woman mourning at Christmas in the dark by lit Christmas tree

    3. A Prayer to Remember Our Loved Ones

    Many people are under the false notion that after you grieve for your loved one, they will be forgotten by you. This is not true. Grieving for your loved one shows how much you love them. In the aftermath of your grief, you will still remember your loved one, and you will still miss them. From my own personal experience, I cannot tell you that grief will end at an exact time because it doesn’t. My grief has continued, and I have chosen to no longer fight it. 

    What I do to help preserve my mother’s memory is to write about her and talk about her with loved ones. In this way, my mother continues to live on in my life, even though she is in Heaven. When we are going through grief, it can be helpful to pray to remember them, and this includes both the good and the bad times. The good and the bad times are both important when we are remembering our loved ones. 

    It is true that I don’t like remembering my mom in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU), but this was part of her final days on earth. Rather than suppressing them or trying to forget them, we need to ask the Lord to help us remember them. I have often worried that I would forget the sound of my mom’s voice, yet I turn to Jesus and allow Him to fill me with peace. Each time when I think I have forgotten her voice, Jesus brings it to mind.

    “Dear Jesus, going through grief at Christmas is terribly hard, but I want to walk through it with grace. Please help me to remember my loved one and to not be afraid of the bad memories. I want to keep the memories of my loved one and share them with others. Thank You for Your goodness, Amen.” 

    Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Kerkez 

  • woman praying at Christmas time holding Bible with tree in background

    4. A Prayer for Contentment

    During periods of grief, it is common to feel the exact opposite of comfort. All we feel is distress and pain. With time, these emotions will be easier to manage, but at first, it can be rather hard. This is why it is important to pray for contentment. This Christmas will probably not be your best Christmas; however, it can still be a wonderful holiday. By reflecting on Jesus and asking Him to fill your heart with contentment, it can help open your eyes to new insights.

    Contentment has the ability to increase our perseverance. Maybe we don’t feel the best right now, but we can still be content in the Lord’s blessings. Christmas is all about Jesus, therefore, it is not hard to celebrate our wonderful Savior. This Christmas might not be full of songs and smiles, but we can still celebrate Jesus and find great comfort in His love.

    “Dear Jesus, please bless my heart with contentment. This current season of life has made me feel as though I have been slighted. I know my loved one’s death is not Your fault. Help me to have a heart of contentment as I enter Christmas this year and to continue to focus on You. In Your Name, I pray, Amen.”

    Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/SDI Productions

  • 5. A Prayer for Happiness Amidst the Pain

    5. A Prayer for Happiness Amidst the Pain

    It is a misnomer that you will never be happy when going through grief. You might feel guilty at times, but this is a false sense of guilt. There is no reason to feel ashamed of being happy, smiling, or forming new memories after your loved one has passed. As mentioned earlier, your loved one wants you to be happy. They don’t want you to be miserable for the rest of your life.

    The first time I smiled after my mom passed was over a year after her passing. Even though it had been a long time, I felt guilty for being happy. However, when I reflected upon my mom’s life, she loved being happy and seeing her daughters smile. This helped me to know that our loved ones who have passed before us do want us to be happy during Christmas as well as on every other day of the year. Even despite the pain, we can still be happy this Christmas season.

    “Dear Lord, please help me to be happy even amidst the pain this year. I know my loved one would want me to be happy. Please take away any feelings of shame or guilt as I know they are not rooted in truth. Amen.”

    Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/Kerkez 

  • Woman mourning her husband a Christmas

    6. A Prayer to See Grief as a Friend Rather than a Curse

    As mentioned, grief is not our enemy. It is our friend. I have befriended my grief because it keeps my mom at the front of my mind. Rather than forgetting her or trying to move past her death, I keep her close to my heart. It is the same for you: you can hold onto the memories of your loved one and see grief as a friend instead of a curse. Grief often gets a bad reputation, but it is truly not anything bad.

    Welcome grief and walk through this Christmas season with confidence. Although Christmases will look differently than they did, we can still have a beautiful Christmas season with our loved ones who are still here. By ceasing the day and making the most of every opportunity, we will be able to enjoy each Christmas in celebration of the Lord. One day, we will see our loved one again, and nobody will take away our joy (John 16:22).

    “Dear Jesus, please help me to see grief as a friend rather than a curse. I don’t want to live any longer with the goal of fighting it. Grief is the natural outpouring of the love I have for my loved one. Help me to celebrate Christmas alongside grief this year. It will look different, but I know it will still be beautiful because I will be celebrating You. Amen.”

    Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/Halfpoint

    Vivian Bricker author bio photoVivian Bricker obtained a Bachelor of Arts in Ministry, followed by a Master of Arts with an emphasis in theology. She loves all things theology, mission work, and helping others learn about Jesus. Find more of her content at Cultivate: https://cultivatechristianity.wordpress.com/.