6 Reminders for Christian Singles Feeling Alone on New Year’s

6 Reminders for Christian Singles Feeling Alone on New Year’s

On New Year’s, it is common for singles to feel alone. After all, most of our friends are ringing in the New Year with their partners. If you’re the only one who doesn’t have a partner in your friend group, it can make it hard not to enjoy the holidays. This is true not only for New Year’s but also for every other holiday. We see others joyfully celebrating the holidays, yet we are just feeling all alone. 

Leave space for these feelings. Allow yourself time to grieve; however, I still want you to have a wonderful New Year’s. There is only one New Year each year, and I don’t want you to miss out on it. There are plenty of fun things you can do on New Year’s that will help you not feel as alone anymore. Moreover, turning to the Lord, relying on Him, and trusting in His blessings can change your mindset. 

Here are six Christian reminders for singles feeling alone on New Year’s.

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  • Woman looking at herself in the mirror

    1. You Are Enough

    First, I want you to know that your feelings are valid. The pain you are going through is terrible and can make you feel as though you are not enough. You are enough because of the Lord. He loves you beyond measure. Even if you were the only person on planet earth, He still would have left Heaven in order to save you. This is how much He loves you and desires to have a personal relationship with you.

    The Bible tells us, “For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, and in Christ you have been brought to fullness. He is the head over every power and authority” (Colossians 2:9-10). In Christ, we are complete. This means we are not lacking anything. It might feel as though we are lacking something when we don’t have a partner, but we have to remember that the Lord has brought us to fullness. 

    Many people believe that we are inferior if we are not married or in a relationship. This is not true because all people are equal in the eyes of God. We are all made in His image and we are dearly beloved (Genesis 1:27). Know that you are good enough and anybody who says otherwise is not worth your time. Whenever you are struggling, remind yourself: “In Christ, I am enough.”

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  • Happy single man smiling in city winter snow Christmas

    2. You Are Loved

    Romans 5:8 tells us, “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” As the Apostle Paul says in this passage, God loved us even though we were living in sin. We didn’t love Him or know Him, yet He loved us and knew us like the backside of His hand. Whenever we are feeling alone, we need to remember that we are loved by God. His love is unconditional, which means it is not based on anything that we have done.

    He loves us just because that is who He is. At God’s very core, He is love (1 John 4:8). When we are facing singleness on New Year’s, it is hard to believe that we are loved. Everyone around us is smiling and being held by their partner while we are freezing in the cold. I know it is hard, but at these moments, try to remember you are loved. You don’t have to feel it to know it is true. 

    Our feelings can change so quickly, therefore, it is best not to place such a high emphasis on them. Negative thoughts and insecurities can also cause us to doubt our ability to be loved. Just because we have not found “the one” doesn’t mean that person isn’t out there. Choose to spend this time now reflecting on God’s love and embracing His truth into your life.

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  • single woman alone journaling by Christmas tree

    3. Singleness Is a Gift

    Without having a partner, it can feel at times that life is miserable. By nature, we don’t want to be alone our entire lives. We want to have a beautiful life, yet we often think it is impossible to have one without being in a relationship or being married. While marriage is a beautiful thing, so is singleness. The Bible refers to singleness as a gift, “I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that” (1 Corinthians 7:7). 

    Within the broader context of this passage, Paul is talking about marriage. Paul praises marriage, yet he also doesn’t want singles to feel they have been slighted in life. As Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:7, he wished all people were like him—single. Singleness is a gift and it is one that needs to be embraced. On New Year’s, as well as every other day, we don’t need to feel we are lacking any good gift from the Lord.

    As we are reflecting on this New Year, we don’t need to see singleness as a curse. We need to see it for what it is: a gift. A gift is not something that we begrudgingly accept. Instead, we accept gifts with joyful and happy hearts. Therefore, we need to accept the beautiful gift of singleness and to stop treating it as something to be fixed.

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  • Man looking through curtains out the window

    4. There Are Many Wonderful Things to Come

    All singles also need to know that there are many wonderful things coming in our future. Whenever we start feeling down about being single, we need to think about all of the blessings that could be just around the corner. Maybe God will allow us to serve on the mission field one day or maybe we will be able to start our own business. Try to think about the things that are coming rather than your situation right now. 

    While we should not gaslight ourselves out of our emotions, we do need to prevent ourselves from falling into depression. It can be depressing to think that we will die alone. Part of life is loving others and being loved. Without a spouse, it can feel really cold and alone. As believers, we have to cling to the promises of brighter days.

    We might never find “the one” or get married, but this does not mean our life will not be amazing. I know many wonderful Christians who have stayed single their entire lives and their lives are beaming with blessings. Rather than viewing our future as darkness and gloom, we need to see it as full of light and beautiful. There are many wonderful things to come if we are willing to wait for them.

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  • 5. Avoid Taking Extreme Views

    5. Avoid Taking Extreme Views

    Within the concept of marriage and singleness, many people take extreme views. Some people believe that marriage is the only option, while others believe that singleness is the only option. When we start taking extreme views such as this, we are doing ourselves and others a disservice. If we are in the marriage-only camp, we will believe that singleness is bad and when we continue to stay single, it will affect our self-worth. 

    On the other hand, if we are in the singleness-only camp, we will be upset when friends or family members get married. This is not healthy and can cause much-unneeded drama. Rather than being in a marriage-only camp or a singleness-only camp, we need to have a healthy balance. This means we need to see marriage and singleness as equally beautiful.

    One is not better than the other nor is one inferior to the other. We need to view marriage and singleness both in a positive light. If we continue to hold onto one of these camps, we will only cause ourselves unnecessary suffering. Choose to view both marriage and singleness as gifts and you will be blessed. No longer will we feel negatively about ourselves or others based on our views of relationships.

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  • Happy couple on date at bookstore

    6. You Might Find Someone This Year

    While I cannot be dogmatic, there is a possibility you could meet someone this year. Maybe this year is the year you will meet the love of your life. Or maybe it won’t be. Nonetheless, you need to step into this New Year with a heart of happiness. Whether you find someone this year or not, you can still have a happy year. Having a partner or being married does not automatically equate to happiness. 

    Far too many people believe that marriage will fix their problems, but this is not true. Any married couple would be able to tell you that married life brings much more responsibilities and possibly more problems. Therefore, there is nothing wrong with wanting to find someone this year, but don’t tear yourself down if you don’t find them this year. Focus on living your life—and who knows? Maybe they might walk into your life at a time when you don’t expect them. 

    Pray for God to guide you to this person and listen to His direction. If God closes this door, respect His decision and rest in the truth that He knows best. God is the Giver of all good gifts (James 1:17). Since this is true, we can be assured that whether we find “the one” or not, we will still have a wonderful New Year. We will have God with us, and He will help us face every day.

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    Vivian Bricker author bio photoVivian Bricker obtained a Bachelor of Arts in Ministry, followed by a Master of Arts with an emphasis in theology. She loves all things theology, mission work, and helping others learn about Jesus. Find more of her content at Cultivate: https://cultivatechristianity.wordpress.com/.