How Can Parents Create More Biblical Christmas Traditions?
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- Updated Dec 21, 2023
I’m here to remind you that this Christmas, you are enough.
As a parent, there is immense pressure in our culture to provide an outlandishly lavish Christmas experience for our children. Our kids expect to receive bundles of gifts and expect each present to be exactly what they wished for. In addition to the gifts, we like to include Christmas experiences. We pay to tour Christmas lights. Parties fill up our December calendar. Hot chocolate, ornament making, cookie creating, and white elephant gift exchanges are all a part of the agenda.
In summary, it can all start to feel like a little much. For many, the expected gift quota, experience making, and food preparation is more than just overwhelming, it’s actually impossible. For the first 12 years of our marriage, we had a maximum total annual income for our family of five of $48,000. Today, that would put us right above the poverty line. Amazingly, we always had just what we needed, but when Christmas rolled around, I felt so much stress because I knew we just really couldn’t give our kids, families, and friends what we wanted to be able to give them. We had little to no margin in our budget. There was not much space for buying things that were not necessities in our lives. Every purchase had to be carefully considered because we were committed to living on the income God had provided for us and not going into debt.
At each holiday gathering, I felt ashamed that my contribution was less than what I wanted to be able to give. When the church's special offering was promoted, I felt guilty because I knew we could not afford to give any more than our tithe. When my kids wanted to do extras like seeing holiday shows or other paid experiences, I knew we didn’t have the financial ability to participate.
Commercialism Has Put Unbiblical Pressure on What Christmas Is for Parents
God has since expanded our family and thankfully also provided more so we can generously care for our children, but the pressure hasn’t gone away. Even as I wrap my kids’ piles of gifts, knowing that in addition to the gifts I got them, their grandparents have also purchased them a pile of new things, I still wonder if I’ve done enough. What a crazy thought that our extraordinarily privileged kids would be harmed if they didn’t get as many gifts as one of their friends!
Boy, has the commercialism of Christmas truly infiltrated deep into what I, as a mother, believe I am offering my children over the holidays! Our years of scarcity did not teach me the lesson they should have. It is not about a pile of gifts; it’s about celebrating the good news of salvation as a family. For those of us who have the extra, this season should be a chance to model extraordinary generosity, just as Jesus did, rather than a chance to get everything on our Amazon wish list purchased for us.
If you are like us, living on just enough, or maybe even not enough, you can still do Christmas well. Your children are able to catch the joy Jesus’ birth grants us even if our budget feels meager. This season, before it turns into a chance for every company to make more money than they know what to do with, it’s about creating space to remember the joy of our salvation as a community. Our children can understand that Jesus is a gift through meaningful conversation, merry traditions, special time together as a family, and simple yet thoughtful gifts to reiterate the gift that Jesus is to us. The chance to make less be more over Christmas is an opportunity to refocus on the message of the holiday rather than the hype.
Prioritize Meaningful Generosity Rather Than Superfluous Spending
If we want to model for our kids a biblical Christmas celebration, then our families need to prioritize meaningful generosity rather than superfluous spending. Spend time asking, what are some needs we as a family can meet in our community this year? How can we share the gospel through our traditions with our community? How can we spark joy in the lives of others over the holidays? How can we limit our own Christmas experience to promote more intentional giving as a family?
Those can be tough questions to ask, but Christmas has gotten out of hand in our culture. If the idea is to show our kids Jesus in this season, we are going to have to start rejecting some of what the culture is selling over the holidays (literally and figuratively). I am so guilty, so this message is for me. I want my kids to receive more than I want to show them how to give. I want to spend more on us than I want to give with purpose. It is easier to go with the tide of Christmas than to thoughtfully create a biblically based tradition for my family, but I feel convicted that it’s time to start making adjustments to how we see this holiday.
My goal is to choose one way to better make Jesus the center of our holiday activities and build on it as the years pass from there. We make advent readings a part of our December rhythm. We choose a family that is financially strapped to purchase gifts for in our community. We celebrate foster parents and social workers as we know this season can be tough for all who help vulnerable families in our communities. We have begun to limit the ways we buy for our extended families, so it’s not an avalanche of unneeded new things. We make Christmas Eve about worship and reflection at our church home. This is our start, but I know we can do more to center our homes on Jesus over the holidays.
Related Resource: Listen to Our FREE Parenting Podcast!
Our culture tells us that Jolly ole St. Nicholas is keeping a list, and he’s checking it twice. He’s gonna find out who’s naughty or nice. But, is that how our faith works? Did God give the great gift of Christ to the world because we were good? Because we deserved Him? Listen to Catherine Segars discuss what the culture gets wrong about Christmas by clicking the play button below!
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