10 Ways to Show Loved Ones You Appreciate Them This Thanksgiving Season
- Jessica Brodie Award-winning Christian Novelist and Journalist
- Updated Nov 21, 2023
Every Thanksgiving we’re bombarded with reminders to “be grateful” and understand how much we are blessed. It almost sounds cliché, the concept of thankfulness, but we all know it’s not. For all people and especially for Christians, it is so important to foster an attitude of gratitude and appreciation for the blessings in your life, whether that is breath in your lungs, the roof above your head, or the people surrounding you.
Our time on this earth is fleeting. The average lifespan of 76.1 years for Americans sounds like a long time, but in the scope of eternity, it is a blink of an eye. We never know when today could be our final day, or whether the farewell we bid a loved one could be our last until we see them again in heaven.
One way we can show our loved ones how much we care for them is to express gratitude for them and for the ways that they have impacted our lives. This doesn’t have to be shared verbally, either.
Here, then, are ten ways we can show people we love and appreciate them not only this Thanksgiving season but throughout the year.
1. Listen
I love that saying: “God gave me two ears and one mouth for a reason.” As a talkative person, I believe we talk far more than we should. Cultivating good listening skills, meaning truly hearing and absorbing what someone is saying and feeling, is important. James 1:19 urges us to “be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,” while Proverbs lifts up the act of “turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding” (Proverbs 2:2). Not only do these show your loved one respect and enable you to understand them on an emotional and intellectual level, but they help bring needed wisdom into your heart and mind.
2. Write Them a Letter or Buy Them a Card
Romans 12:10 urges us, “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.” One way we can do this is to express it in a way they can hold onto and treasure, such as writing them a note or letter telling them how much you appreciate them, and why. “I appreciate you” is nice to hear, but when someone hears exactly why they are appreciated with a concrete example, this can touch them for a lifetime. If you are not a writer, consider a card that expresses exactly how you feel and how they impact your life.
3. Tell Them in Person
It might be easier to express your appreciation in a folded letter or card, something that becomes a memento they might choose to keep for a lifetime, but there’s also something extraordinarily heartwarming about a face-to-face, in-person expression of appreciation. Looking into your friend or family member’s eyes as you share your gratitude is a real-life moment that often freezes in time, a beautiful memory that lasts for eternity — for you and for them.
As Philippians 2:3 reminds us, “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.”
4. Spend Time with Them, Even When It’s Completely Inconvenient
We often fill our days with the things we think we “have” to do — commuting, running errands, and other general busyness — instead of the more meaningful moments. But I think we’d all agree that at the end of our earthly days, we’ll treasure lunch with a loved one or simply taking time to be with someone over that project we think we must do. Sometimes it’s completely inconvenient to break from my work (and my workaholic ways!) to meet a sister in Christ for coffee, but it’s actually the wiser choice in the grand scheme of things.
Ephesians 5:15-16 shares, “Be very careful, then, how you live — not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil.”
5. Be Positive
A well-timed sarcastic remark can be hilarious, but when it comes to genuinely appreciating friends and family, the impact of positivity and encouragement cannot be emphasized enough. As a Christian, you have the Holy Spirit in your heart, and His holy fire illuminates your life. Let that light shine with others. Let joy and praise fill you up and bubble out upon the people around you. Shining that light is a gift you can pass on to your loved ones.
Ephesians 5:18-20 urges us to “be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit. Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.”
It’s a beautiful way to show the people you love that you appreciate them while also shining God’s light in what can be a dark world.
6. Do Something Nice for Them
You know that feeling you get when someone surprises you with doughnuts just, well, because? Doing something kind and unexpected is a lovely and thoughtful way to show gratitude for your loved one. Buy a friend flowers or coffee. Bring the trash cans in for a neighbor. A little gesture shows you are thinking of them and appreciate them in your life.
As Jesus says in Matthew 7:12, “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you.”
7. Help Them with a Chore
Believe it or not, this one can be fun. When my friend got sick with an autoimmune issue and needed to alter her diet, she had no idea how to cook some of these dishes, nor did she have the energy. So I came over and cooked for her. It was a lot of work, but we had a great time hanging out, and I was able to bless her with something she really needed in appreciation for her friendship. You might help your non-tech-savvy family member set up their new computer, or help your brother host a garage sale or clean up his yard.
As we’re told in Galatians 6:2, “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”
8. Buy Them a Thoughtful Gift
I’m not a natural gift-giver. I’m pretty frugal, and while I love browsing boutiques, you’ll rarely see me buy myself anything. But a thoughtful gift can express tremendous gratitude.
If you’re out and see something that truly reminds you of a loved one—like that pair of Bigfoot socks I saw at a tourist shop in the mountains that reminded me of my close friend—why not surprise yourself (and them!) with it? It’s a small way to show lots of love.
As Proverbs 18:16 says, “A gift opens the way and ushers the giver into the presence of the great.”
9. Bake for Them
Usually, it’s not too tough to double or even triple a recipe. So the next time you find yourself baking, whether that’s bread or cookies, think about who in your life might be blessed by a sweet treat. If you’re making banana bread, why not bake an extra for your coworker or neighbor? How about a plate of cookies for your sister or a favorite dessert for your spouse? Taking the time to do this is a gesture of love, care, and appreciation.
“And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased” (Hebrews 13:16).
10. Tag Along for Something Tough
If your loved one hates going to the doctor or dentist, offer to drive her. If your friend is having trouble waking up early to go running, lace up your sneakers and join him. Recently my mom wanted to try out a new church that has more traditional liturgical elements, but she didn’t want to go alone. So even though I have my own church, I went with her one Sunday, and now she feels comfortable enough to go on her own.
Sometimes, life is easier when someone is walking beside you.
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 reminds us, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.”
Stretch yourself as you think of ways to show gratitude for those in your life. As much as your loved one will appreciate your gesture, you’ll find yourself just as blessed by your effort to express your appreciation.
More from this author
10 Prayers to Turn Your Heart Towards Thankfulness This Season
Seven Things Jesus and His Disciples Taught Us about Giving Thanks
9 Ways Becoming a Mom Has Changed Me from a Faith Perspective
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/digitalskillet
Jessica Brodie is an award-winning Christian novelist, journalist, editor, blogger, and writing coach and the recipient of the 2018 American Christian Fiction Writers Genesis Award for her novel, The Memory Garden. She is also the editor of the South Carolina United Methodist Advocate, the oldest newspaper in Methodism. Her newest release is an Advent daily devotional for those seeking true closeness with God, which you can find at https://www.jessicabrodie.