How to Choose Gratitude in Great and Terrible Times

It is quite biblical to thank God when you have survived a storm or crisis. When you are still standing after a tough stretch, that is cause for gratitude.

This theme runs through the Psalms.

Check out the tough times mentioned as an opportunity for giving thanks:

-Times of heartache (Psalm 42:4)

-Times of repentance (Psalm 50:22-23)

-Times of sorrow (Psalm 56:8-13)

-Times of need (Psalm 107:1-9)

-Times of pain (Psalm 109:22-31)

-Times of grief (Psalm 116:15-17)

-Times of trouble (Psalm 138:-1-8)

In all of these tough times – Scripture tells us to be grateful. Maybe 2022 has been a good year for you. We easily forget the good times until tougher times come along. If God has blessed you this year, give thanks!

How do we choose to give thanks in the good times and the bad? In the valley and on the mountaintop? Christian author Dallas Willard says this about gratitude: "Gratitude is an expression of appreciation, an articulation of what we have received. Like a receipt, our gratitude is evidence of the transaction of grace from God."

We are admonished over 300 times in the Bible to give thanks. 300 times! It is a central theme in Scripture because it is a significant need in our lives. We need to rediscover the lost art of gratitude. Unfortunately, the national pastime has become complaining. As Christ's followers, we want to be different. We want to learn to be grateful. The spiritual practice of thanksgiving changes our lives. The key word here is practice:

-If you want to become a baker, you need to practice baking.

-If you want to be a runner, you have to live a runner's lifestyle. That is not on my bucket list.

-To be a musician, you must adopt a musician's practices. If you want to be a good musician, it takes a lot of practice.

How do we choose to be thankful? How can we learn to practice gratitude?

Check out these directions from Paul, the author of almost half of the New Testament:

"Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts. And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father." Colossians 3:16-17

There are three directions in those verses about how we can choose gratitude.

First – act in gratitude.

We are told that whatever we do should be done in thanks. Not just the things we want to do or like to do. All things can be done with thanks.

For the past thirty years, I have ministered to women. I speak. I counsel. But mostly, I write. I write devotions and articles like this one. Can I be honest here? I don't always feel like writing. Sometimes writing is a joy. Often writing is work. And sometimes it is like giving birth!

Regardless of what I am doing and how I feel about it, I can do it in gratitude. I can do it as an act of giving thanks to God. Thanks for the health to do it. Thanks for the opportunity to do it. Thanks for the energy to do it (sometimes, that is a prayer of gratitude). Thanks for the work itself.

To make sure we are getting the message, Paul adds these words a few verses later:

"Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people." Colossians 3:23

Whatever you do – do it for an audience of One. Do it for God. Do it like He is your boss – because He is!

Second – speak in gratitude.

This verse that tells us to act in gratitude also instructs us to speak in gratitude. When I do this – it changes everything. It changes my speech, my tone, and my emotions.

Here is a filter verse – a verse that can act as a guide for our speech.

"Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them." Ephesians 4:29

There are five filters in that verse for our speech. All five will help us to be grateful in what we say.

-Avoid foul language. It is impossible to thank God in your heart while cursing comes from your lips. Jesus taught us in Luke 6:45 that what is in the heart comes out in our speech. My mother often said, "What's down in the well comes up in the bucket." Same idea.

-Avoid abusive language. Words that wound and cut, and destroy are not from God. We need to filter our thoughts through gratitude before we speak them out loud.

-Speak that which is good. Will what I am about to say add goodness? Will it honor God? Will it add to gratitude? 

-Speak that which is helpful. The point of speaking is not so you feel better. The point of speaking is to help someone else.

-Speak that which is encouraging. To encourage someone means to speak in such a way that you put courage in them.

These filters are game changers – and will help us to speak in gratitude.

First – we choose to act in gratitude. Second – we choose to speak in gratitude.

Third – we give in gratitude. 

Life is not about what we get. It is about what we give. It is about giving away our lives to others. Check out what Jesus says about the mindset of giving in gratitude.

"It is more blessed to give than to receive." Acts 20:35

"If you are sued in court, and your shirt is taken from you, give your coat, too. If a soldier demands that you carry his gear for a mile, carry it two miles. Give to those who ask, and don't turn away from those who want to borrow." Matthew 5:40-42

If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it. Matthew 10:39

Giving is evidence of gratitude. Giving away what we believe we have earned or deserve is hard. However, when we recognize God as the source of everything we have, it is much easier to give out of gratitude. A grateful heart is a giving heart. And even when we struggle with gratitude, giving plants the seeds of thankfulness.

So, let's land this plane. Here are some closing thoughts.

• Thanksgiving is not just a fall holiday. It is a year-round state of mind.
• If your year has been challenging, thank God that He has sustained you.
• If your year has been good, thank God that He has blessed you.

We can all turn up our gratitude in three ways.

• Choose to act in gratitude.
• Choose to speak in gratitude.
• Choose to give in gratitude.

May God teach us all to walk in gratitude!

Mary Southerland is also the Co-founder of Girlfriends in God, a conference and devotion ministry for women. Mary’s books include, Hope in the Midst of Depression, Sandpaper People, Escaping the Stress Trap, Experiencing God’s Power in Your Ministry, 10-Day Trust Adventure, You Make Me So Angry, How to Study the Bible, Fit for Life, Joy for the Journey, and Life Is So Daily. Mary relishes her ministry as a wife, a mother to their two children, Jered and Danna, and Mimi to her six grandchildren – Jaydan, Lelia, Justus, Hudson, Mo, and Nori.