10 Signs You Married for the Wrong Reasons

1. Adultery

God warns us about adultery, and the consequences can be devastating. That doesn’t mean marriages that begin as a result of adultery or suffer from it can’t last until death do they part, but it sure does make it a lot harder than God intended it to be. 

“Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery” (Hebrews 13:4). 

Even marriage that goes the way God intended it to be is hard! Succumbing to adultery may mean we married someone other than whom God intended for us. However, we serve a God of restoration and healing, even in the most undeserved and sinful of circumstances. 

2. Impatience

There is something stolen from marriage when sex comes first. In our society, it’s widely acceptable. Giving in to someone who can’t wait steals our own opportunity to patiently anticipate the one God has for us. It can be hard to believe He has someone set aside specifically for us, and too difficult to save sex for marriage even when we've found that person. Many of us don’t understand how valuable we are to God. When we settle for the “now,” we blindly give up the best-case scenario. 

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 warns, “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” 

3. Moved in Already

Living together before marriage may steal the opportunity to gain independence before being linked for life. It’s important for individuals to be OK with who they are before becoming one with another. Knowing they are able to live together well before getting married is a comfort to many, but it's not necessary when we trust God has set aside a good match for us. 

“Watch out for people who try to dazzle you with big words and intellectual double-talk. They want to drag you off into endless arguments that never amount to anything. They spread their ideas through the empty traditions of human beings and the empty superstitions of spirit beings. But that’s not the way of Christ. Everything of God gets expressed in him, so you can see and hear him clearly. You don’t need a telescope, a microscope, or a horoscope to realize the fullness of Christ, and the emptiness of the universe without him. When you come to him, that fullness comes together for you, too. His power extends over everything” (Colossians 2:8-10).

No other person can ever complete us. Christ is the only one that is capable of filling our hearts.  

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